


A Moment Deferred

by freifraufischer



Series: Walking out of Darkness [2]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-20
Updated: 2015-03-15
Packaged: 2018-03-08 07:49:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 40,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3201269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freifraufischer/pseuds/freifraufischer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Emma and the mayor had a complicated, no complications sexual affair in season one, before curses and murder and lies exposed them both.  Now Emma has to figure out if it was all just a game by an Evil Queen, while Regina has to decide what kind of life she wants to rebuild, and what kind of person she wants to be.  Season 2 Canon divergent after 2.17.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: The prologue takes place around 1.12, while the rest of the Chapter 1 the night between 2.09 and 2.10. The rest of the fic takes place immediately after the events of 2.17. The rating may be upped for later chapters. Be warned, this is a very slow burn.
> 
> Second A/N: This story is set in the immediate aftermath of the Cora plot, Regina took Snow's heart recently, and although it departs from canon this is the same time that in canon she was deciding to kill everyone in town and return to the Enchanted Forest with Henry. This is late season 2 Regina. Regina is _not_ redeemed at this point.

Prologue

"You could at least pretend to dress like an actual sheriff."

Emma groaned as she was zipping her jeans and trying to find her socks. Why was it that her socks always ended up flung about in the strangest places after these encounters.

"You have an obsession with the way I dress, Madam Mayor."

"Sue me for wanting city employees to dress like adults, and not in tacky leather jackets bought at thrift stores."

The insults usually happened not long after the sex. When both the mayor and the sheriff tried to remember despite what had just happened that they in fact hated each other. And they did hate each other. Regina had made that abundantly clear. From the moment she came into town.

How they ended up in these encounters Emma tried not to think too hard about. The first time had been in the mayor's office. There had been yelling. And then there was kissing. And other things. And as comfortable as that couch was, the desk and the table and the wall were less so. So they found themselves at Granny's. Regina apparently kept a room here.

Probably for Graham originally.

Now for Emma.

This wasn't a relationship. Emma was clear on that. Regina was clear on that. It was sex. Meaningless sex. With a woman she hated. With the woman who was the mother of her son.

Okay, perhaps not quite meaningless sex.

And damn it was good.

"Don't knock thrift stores. You find the best stuff in things people throw away."

Regina smiled, having slipped back into her own clothes as if Emma hadn't practically torn them off her an hour before. She smiled and kissed her. "That you do. Now go back and do your job Sheriff. Try to be an adult for once."


	2. Chapter 1

Emma walked up the path to the mayor's house the night after getting home with some trepidation. If it had been two weeks ago, right after the curse broke, or really just about any time she'd been in the Enchanted Forest she would have said that she was going to storm up this walkway and perhaps even kick down the door. She was a bounty hunter it wouldn't have been the first door she kicked in. But she'd landed in that well with Mary Margaret and crawled out and there was Regina Mills sprawled on the ground and Henry telling them that she'd saved them.

It took a while to get anything like a story that made sense out of Henry, and that was being generous. Gold wasn't talking obviously and Regina...

She was still mad at Regina. And she wasn't. She used the door knocker and heard the footsteps approaching. Regina wore heels in her own home. She'd teased her about it once. When she was tentatively trying out teasing her lover without meaning to hurt her. That hadn't lasted long.

Her lover. She had been sleeping with Regina on and off for months before the curse broke. It had started after August came to town. After she started to wonder if Regina perhaps wasn't the uncaring monster she thought. But it had also started as angry hate sex. The first time it had been in the mayor's office. Well the first several times. They usually started as fights. Their tendency to get right up in each other's face to intimidate each other seemed to lead to other things as well.

It started with kisses they'd pretend didn't mean anything. They'd even pretended the first few times didn't happen. The sex came quickly though. Full of anger and passion and absolutely nothing like what Graham had described sex with Regina was like. Though the fact that he was a man and she was not might explain that. After the sex there would be a brief moment when Emma thought anything could be said and meant, before either she or Regina would close that door and they were Sheriff Swan and Mayor Mills again.

Two women who loathed each other having meaningless sex. Who had a son between them. And it wasn't exactly meaningless. The problem was it had way too much meaning. At least from Emma's point of view.

Regina seemed to take a moment at the door before opening it, and Emma wondered if she was schooling her expression for a lynch mob. Either way she was annoyingly put together for it being past ten in the evening with god knows what kind of magic she'd absorbed. "Miss. Swan."

"We need to talk." Emma said bluntly.

"It's late."

"I've been tramping through the forest for two weeks, you aren't avoiding this conversation longer."

"Do your parents know where you are?"

"I'm not five Regina."

"No you aren't, but knowing Snow she's likely to try and treat you like you are."

"I'm not here to talk about my parents."

"Of course not." Regina stepped aside. "Can I get you a drink?"

Emma knew she should say no. She knew that Regina mixed drinks stronger than anyone she'd ever met including sailors. "Yes, please."

Regina lead her to a side room and poured them both glasses from a decanter. Regina was the only person Emma had ever met who kept her liquor in fancy bottles. If you had fancy liquor in most places Emma had been, you wanted to be able to show off the label.

It made a certain amount of sense that she would be a queen. Except nothing about this made any sense.

Regina handed her a glass. "Are you here to kill me, Miss. Swan?"

Emma blinked, several times, "What part of we need to talk wasn't clear. Kill you?"

"You've just come back from our home. You've seen a lot of our world. Deposed queens are inconvenient and your parents don't have the heart. Not Snow certainly. David thinks he does but I'm not even sure he does." She moved to sit down in a wing backed chair.

Emma stood stock still where she was with her glass still trying to articulate how crazy that just sounded.

"You were sleeping with me."

"We didn't actually sleep you know."

"Stop playing games." Emma growled. "Was that what it was to you? A game? Sleep with the woman who is supposed to break your curse. Distract her?"

"I think we were distracting to each other, Emma." Regina said with a sigh and used her first name for the first time in the conversation. "Yes... and no."

"That's not an answer."

"It's frequently the answer." Regina took a long swig of her own drink.

"You spent the last year using every weapon in your arsenal trying to protect your curse."

Regina actually laughed at that and Emma didn't know how to respond. "Emma... you will never know what hell that curse was for me. Everyone else at least didn't know they were trapped for twenty eight years. I attended the same school board meeting more than four hundred times. I know. I counted once. During the same meeting."

There was something odd about the way Regina was acting. Not drunk. Though given how strong her own drink was when she tasted it one could wonder. "Alright, so what was all that bullshit?"

Regina smiled. "What do you want to ask Emma, really? I've had a long day. Absorbing a mine full of fairy dust will make you tired."

"Did you really save our lives today?"

Regina actually cocked her head to the side. "I did. Henry asked me to trust him."

"Why were you trying to kill us?"

"I wasn't. I agreed with Gold that the portal needed to be closed to prevent my mother from coming through. She'd destroy everything I have. She's done it before. He wanted my help... though never actually asked me to do anything. Which should have been a clue..."

She swirled her drink and finished it off.

"A clue to what?"

"Best guess? He was going to blame it on me. I had the motive for wanting you and your mother dead. It wouldn't have been the first time I fell into the trap of being one of his pawns."

Emma desperately wanted her to explain that remark, but now didn't seem the time.

"So you saved us for Henry."

"I saved you for Henry."

Emma nodded, accepting that. She might not have a few months before, but she had seen Regina the day he ate the apple turnover. Whatever kind of warped heart Regina Mills had, she loved Henry as much as she was capable of loving anything.

Which come to think of it was frighteningly intensely.

"And me? Was that all a game too?"

"I told you already, yes and no."

"Sometimes I just want to punch you in the face."

Regina smiled. "Careful Emma, last time we came to blows we both went away wounded. Besides, I'm not quite so defenseless now."

Emma remembered now why so many of their conversations resulted in threats.

"Explain it then."

"I loathed you, and I hated you and I found you the most fascinating thing that had walked through my life except for Henry in twenty eight years. And I tried to pick you apart, find the best ways to destroy you, and make you run away. And you would find ways to counter me. It was like a very grand chess game. Except the cost of me losing was you taking my son."

"He's my son."

"Can we defer that argument for when I have more energy? Because you know I'll dispute that to my dying breath."

Emma was silent, half angry and half ashamed, and she had no idea where that second emotion was coming from.

"So maybe when you kissed me the first time I thought it was an interesting opportunity. But I'm a woman who obsesses over things easily."

"Like a decades long murderous vengeance spree against Snow White for being prettier than you?"

That actually made Regina laugh more than Emma had ever heard. She might have even called it hysterical. "Is that what she's saying? I thought it was only the Disney version..."

"She wont say why. I don't think she knows."

"She knows." But apparently Regina wasn't in a sharing mood.

"Perhaps I should go..."

Regina looked up at her. "So it's over?"

"What's over?"

"The thing between us."

Emma looked at her, not for the first time, as if she was crazy. "You aren't who I thought you were."

"You are."

"It needed to be a two way street. Listen... I believe you when you say it wasn't malicious. But you are ... not someone I really want to be having sex with. Not now." Part of Emma knew that was a lie. She'd have to sort her feelings about that out later. "Listen... there is going to be this thing tomorrow. At Granny's. You should come."

"The victory party? I don't think I'm on the invite list."

"You are on mine. Come. Henry wants you to be there."

Something lit up in Regina's eyes and for a moment Emma wondered about that woman. The one behind the masks.

"Listen Regina... I don't care what happened in that other land. I'm going to give you your second chance. Just don't waste it."

The former mayor, and former evil queen just nodded. "I wont."

Unfortunately for them both her mother had other plans...


	3. Chapter 2

She wasn't hard to find. It's not like the entire town wasn't on edge every time she went anywhere in public, and they sometimes even called the sheriff's office. The queen is at the supermarket. Well, what is she doing? Buying groceries... the voice on the other end of the phone would say, as if realizing how silly it sounded as they said it. Sometimes they even apologized for wasting Emma's time. Most of the time they didn't. Regina had slipped back into a routine, she'd even gone back to the mayor's office, despite some protests. That was until Emma and a few other city employees had to point out to people that despite what they all thought before, the mayor's office actually did a lot to keep the town going. Privately Emma thought Regina needed something to do with her time.

After school was out she could be reliably found on a park bench with a nice view of the playground Henry liked. It was far enough away that no one could really object, and Emma wasn't even sure Henry knew she was there. But that's where Emma found her today.

"Do you mind if I sit?"

"If I said yes, would it matter?"

"Probably not," Emma admitted. "We never did talk again... after that night I came back from..."

Emma could never really manage to get the words out without mumbling. She'd been there and it still seemed like a crazy thing to say.

"The Enchanted Forest. I think we've probably said everything to each other that needs to be said." Regina didn't look at her, but kept watching Henry playing.

"We didn't." Emma sighed. "Are you determined to wall yourself away?"

"Is this some sort of Charming olive branch? I thought things were pretty final at the Well."

Magic makes good people do bad things. Henry had said, and Emma's reply she dearly wished she could pull back. And bad people.

"He loves you. You could try being the person he wants you to be."

"Why would that help. You aren't the person he thinks you are, Emma." The former Queen observed finally turning her head.

"We both said a lot of things we shouldn't have said. But you were trying to kill my family."

"I was." Regina admitted without any seeming remorse. "It was the only way any of you people were going to stop standing between me and my son."

"You were doing better for him. I know."

"And then you proved what a grand waste of effort that was."

"Your mother set you up."

"Don't you talk about my mother."

"Regina..."

"I told you magic had a price. Or didn't you suppose I was living enough proof of that."

"I ... shouldn't have trusted Pongo's memories..."

Regina's head snapped around as if she'd was ready to burn Emma's face off with her stare. "You were going to take Henry away from me forever based on the memories of a DOG?"

"When you put it that way..."

"Don't even try and walk that one back Miss. Swan."

"You were calling me Emma, sometimes, before..." Before the curse breaking. Before all of this mess. Before when the two of them had found each themselves in bed. More than once.

"You've made your feelings about that perfectly clear."

Emma gave a sigh and a shake of her head. "I'm not sure how that could be as I am not perfectly clear about my feelings about that."

She expected Regina to make some sort of snippy reply. Demeaning her intelligence or her capacity for adult feelings, but none came. "What do you want, Emma?"

"I just want to maybe... figure out some way we can all live together in this town."

"Aren't we doing that already?"

"No... we're all waiting for the next time we all go at each other like rabid dogs. I thought maybe we could work something out. For you ... and for Henry."

"Do not try and use my son to keep me on a leash." Regina said testily.

"I'm not. I want you to be better for him. But I think it's time we start listening to him. He misses you."

Regina looked over at her and Emma wondered if she was trying to figure out if she was telling the truth. "I thought perhaps... you could have him for dinner on Wednesdays and Saturdays?"

"At home?"

Emma inhaled through her teeth, "Can we try Granny's at first?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"I'd be lying if I said yes."

"And what's the price?"

"No price. Though it would be rather nice if you weren't actively trying to kill us."

"Do I look like I'm trying to kill you?"

"You look like someone whose very lost, Regina. I know that feeling."

"You don't know me."

"Perhaps. But maybe I'd like to..."

The look that crossed Regina's face was heart breaking, soft and vulnerable, and all the more crushing for how fast it was gone. Emma had seen that look on the faces of way too many kids in foster care. "So, dinner at Granny's?"

"Are we being chaperoned?"

"Well, half the town will be there, so I wouldn't say people wont be watching you. But I'm not asking anyone to keep an eye on you." Emma got up from the bench to leave. She got about ten feet before she could hear Regina's voice.

"Emma, wait...?"

She turned around and raised an eyebrow.

"Thank you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mary Margaret came by the sheriff's station with dinner. Emma was relieved to see that she looked a bit more like her old self. What had happened with Cora had nearly destroyed her, and neither David nor Emma really knew what to do about it. Emma honestly had trouble even getting the entire story out of her mother. Something about dark magic though.

It was enough not to want to mention the occasional sparks that she'd seen from her own fingers. At first she thought it was just static shock until she'd actually been looking at her hand when it happened.

"Oh, I thought Henry would be here..."

"He's at Granny's with Regina." She said looking up from her paperwork and taking the offered bag of food without comment starting to rummage around.

"With... Regina."

"Yes, she and I agreed she could have him for dinner twice a week."

"Are you sure that's wise..." Mary Margaret said carefully, in a tone that made Emma wonder if she'd use the same words if she had said that she let Henry juggle dynamite.

"She's his mother."

"You're his mother."

"Kind of..." Emma said quietly. "I mean I am... but he misses her. There are all these things that she knows about him... I'm starting to understand what she meant when I met her. About the hard stuff."

"Did you at least get her to agree to behave?"

"She's with Henry. She'll behave. Besides I've seen Granny with that crossbow she keeps stashed under the counter."

"Regina can catch arrows mid air."

"Really?" Emma realized by the look on her mother's face that perhaps that sounded a bit too excited. She decided to cover it up by taking a bite of her sandwich. Which turned into about six.

"We have to start trusting her eventually."

"No Emma... that's exactly what we can't do."

"She's not going away. We can't arrest her, we don't have any way to hold her, so perhaps we should stop beating her with sticks and perhaps see about giving her the second chance I screwed up on the first time."

"Emma... Regina doesn't take second chances."

Emma looked up into Mary Margaret's eyes and wondered, not for the first time, what really had gone on between those two women.

"Are you going to tell me about what happened between you?"

"Emma there aren't enough books in all the world to explain me and Regina."

"I mean after we got her to destroy the curse."

Mary Margaret's eyes got a bit big and she sat down.

"So you did go to see her?"

"I asked her to end it. To kill me."

Emma raised both eyebrows and stopped chewing, but decided not to comment. Nothing she could say would mean all that much.

"Our feud... it has taken so much out of both of us. I just wanted it to be over. And she took my heart out."

"Wait a second... could you go back and repeat that bit?" Emma couldn't quite compute the idea of taking someone's heart out of their chest. Mary Margaret was after all still standing there. She knew what happened with Aurora, but there was knowing... and knowing.

"She took it out and instead of crushing it.. she showed me the price of the magic I used to kill her mother."

"Why does the price of magic never sound like infinite puppies and rainbows?"

Mary Margaret gave her a look before continuing. "My heart has started to darken. I don't know if I can come back from it. She said that... She said that once your darken yourself you can never come back."

"And you believed her?"

"Wouldn't she know?" Mary Margaret asked, and suddenly Emma felt very much the older sister not the daughter.

"Maybe the answer is that someone has to believe in her like you have people believing in you."

"I believed in her for years, Emma. All it did was break my own heart."

Emma sighed, and part of her wondered why there was a knot in her own chest right now.


	4. Chapter 3

Emma sat down on the bench uninvited this time and without asking for permission.

"You know I could light you on fire."

"That is a neat trick of yours. How do you not burn your clothing?" Emma asked casually as if the mayor hadn't just threatened her. She held out a cup of coffee to her. On the side of the cup was scrawled 'her majesty'.

Regina raised an eyebrow and opened the lid to look inside. "I don't light myself on fire because I'm not some kind of comedy wizard from a Warner Brother's cartoon. How did you know how I took my coffee?"

"I asked your secretary. She's weirdly loyal to you, you know."

"Despite what your parents might want to think, I was not universally hated and they were not universally loved." She drank from the cup and seemed satisfied.

"Where did you start making jokes about Looney Toons. Or are they so old that they showed them in the Enchanted Forest."

Regina rolled her eyes. "I do have a 12 year old son. I'd say I know more about cartoons than you do, but you are a child."

"I'm not ... christ how old are you?"

Regina turned to look at her. "Is this some sort of strange punishment, Miss. Swan, or are you here for a reason?"

Emma shifted a little and folded one of her legs under her, and took a sip from her own coffee. "Why do you hate my mother?"

"Ask your mother." Regina said dismissively.

"I did. She just looked sad and started to cry."

"I understand that's her normal state of being these days. That's what happens when you construct your entire self worth around being good and righteous and fail to live up to your own propaganda."

"You sound disappointed in her."

"I don't care about your mother."

Emma shook her head. "I tracked down criminals for a long time Regina. The kind of single minded obsession you had for her doesn't come from lack of feeling."

"So now I'm a criminal?" Though for some reason the question lacked actual hurt feelings.

"I'm pretty sure you qualify, technically, though everything is bigger in the Enchanted Forest. You murdered a lot of people, I got that from the book."

"Queen's don't murder, they execute."

"Well that's a creepy distinction."

"Miss. Swan, what do you want?"

"I told you."

"Ask your father than, if your mother is too ashamed to admit it."

"He told me to ask my mother."

"Well I'm glad to know this circular conversation isn't for naught..." Regina kept her eye on Henry. "You should get him to wear gloves. It's getting colder and he always forgets them."

Emma nodded and mumbled an okay. It hadn't even occurred to her, and part of her felt ashamed that Regina had to point it out.

"Why wont you tell me?"

Regina drank her coffee. "You wont understand. Perhaps I'd prefer to be thought of as capricious and a sociopath rather than ..."

Weak. Emma knew instantly that was what the mayor was thinking. She wasn't sure how. But she knew this woman so much better than either wanted to admit.

"... besides, your mother gave me all the more reason to hate her last month."

"I was going to ask what happened in your family mausoleum, but I thought I'd start with the original story. Because it's not because she was prettier than you."

Regina chuckled and Emma thought it might have been genuine. "Careful Miss. Swan, I might think you didn't hate me."

"I don't."

Regina looked over at her with those big dark eyes she'd sometimes looked down at her with during sex the previous year. As if she was about to ask something really important. But Emma had learned the question would never come.

"Henry said he enjoyed dinner."

"And what did your spies tell you?"

"That you actually ate french fries."

"Henry likes them."

"Regina... I'm trying to understand."

"And what if I don't want you to understand?"

"I'm just going to keep coming back until I understand anyway."

Regina was silent for a very long time. Emma decided that she'd wait a few more minutes before leaving. It was fun watching Henry play with his friends. She could understand why Regina came here every day.

"Be careful of Gold."

"What?" Emma was surprised, the comment seemed to come out of nowhere.

"Be careful of Gold. I know he's playing dotting grandfather right now, but I've known him for a long time. His heart is as dark as mine. Maybe darker. He's always working an angle."

"Neal doesn't trust him either."

"He's got good reason for those feelings I'm sure. But children love their parents even when they shouldn't." Emma was sure that Regina was speaking from personal experience. But was she talking about Henry, or about herself? "But I also meant you should be careful."

"Me?"

"Your magic."

"I'm not interested in it. You said it, magic comes with a price."

Regina chuckled, and smiled. "Ignore it if you want. See how that works out for you." And with that Regina stood up taking her coffee with her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma was drinking in the Rabbit Hole, mostly because Henry was with Neal for the evening and David and Mary Margaret had finally learned the sock trick. Ruby sat down next to her with a glass of something bright blue, and probably even stronger than the Jack Daniels in Emma's glass.

"You look like you could use a friend."

"Aren't you my friend anyway?" Emma smiled.

"Which is why I came over." She nodded to the glass. "I figured you were more the drinking at home sort."

"Mary Margaret and David are ..."

"Catching up on lost years." Ruby finished with a sage nod. Ever since the curse broke her friend seemed to become more perceptive. Mature.

"So why the drinking. Men problems?"

After all it was a small town and Neal was new and thus the subject of a lot of curiosity and gossip.

"Good god no. Neal and I... that was over a long time ago."

"Snow will be disappointed."

"My mother is trying to set me up with my ex?"

"She can't help it."

"Maybe I should feel glad that she's up to match making."

Ruby just nodded. Mary Margaret's depression was concerning to a lot of her friends.

"So if it's not boy problems is it girl problems?"

"Not exactly. Regina."

Ruby inhaled, seeming to decide if she wanted to speak or not. "I think in your case she qualifies."

Emma gave her a look.

"You two were using the B&B... don't worry. I've never told anyone. Not even Snow."

"It's been over for a long time."

"I should hope. But for what it's worth... I do understand. She's not an unattractive woman. And coming from one monster about another..."

"You aren't a monster. You just have... a condition."

Ruby just smiled and shook her head a little. "There is a reason I love you Charmings."

"I'm really not sure I want that family name."

"Too late. So what has Regina done lately? Besides eat more greasy food than I've ever seen her eat in her entire life."

"She wants to please Henry."

"He does seem happy when he has dinner with her."

"He says he is." Emma drank from her glass. "She's his mom."

"So are you."

"Sort of."

Ruby sighed again. "What about Regina?"

"I asked her why she hated Mary Margaret."

Ruby raised an eyebrow. "What did she say?"

"Ask my mother."

"And what did she say."

"She started to cry."

Ruby ordered another drink, and Emma looked over at her. "Don't look at me. I never knew. None of us did. Even after Snow bit the apple. There was this rumor it was all about vanity, but really, Regina is many things but not that shallow."

"What do you think it was?"

"I'm... not sure. The Queen... not the one you know. Remember I grew up in her kingdom. She had these intense eyes. And she was so cold. And after I met Snow... did she ever tell you how we met?"

"She said something about you teaching her to track."

Ruby smiled. "I caught her hiding in our chicken coop and stealing eggs. She was ... Oh Emma she was so well mannered and polite and it was the dead of winter and she barely seemed to know how to survive. I figured that anyone who could hate someone like that must have had a heart of stone. And then we fought her and Regina... the Queen... she was terrifying. I never understood Snow's fondness for her."

"She told me she saved her life once."

"Snow's said that to me too."

"Why won't either of them tell me what happened. Their stupid vendetta shaped my entire life..."

"Does it really matter? It's in the past."

"It matters because I feel like it should matter to someone."

I feel like her pain should matter to someone, Emma added silently to herself.


	5. Chapter 4

Neal had dropped Henry off with Emma a bit later than they agreed. Apparently Henry really wanted ice cream and Neal had not yet developed the ability to resist anything his new son wanted. Emma could sympathize. She was picking up that skill, but only slowly.

"How are you doing, kid?"

"I'm not feeling so hot..."

Emma frowned, and put a hand to his forehead, but immediately regretted it because she didn't actually know what the feeling would mean either way. "Why don't brush your teeth and get to bed early. I'm sure you'll feel better in the morning."

The idea of going to bed early seemed like its own punishment to Henry, but he nodded and disappeared off. Mary Margaret and David had told her they'd be out late and not to wake up, and she planned to dig out her Star Wars dvds and watch the movie. It was less fun if you couldn't blast the sound, but she'd live. It was half way through the trash compactor scene when she heard Henry come running down the stairs and into the bathroom.

The sound of retching meant she didn't have to ask what was going on. She was immediately wondering if she should call the ambulance or maybe just take him to the hospital herself. He wasn't even done throwing up and she was pacing the loft trying to figure out what to do. She wasn't used to panicking about anything, but she didn't even know where to start tackling this problem.

She pulled her phone from her pocket and scrolled through her numbers until she found it.

"Mills." Regina sounded annoying alert for it to be past 11PM.

"It's Emma. Henry's throwing up and ..."

"I'll be right there."

"You don't ..."

But before the conversation could continue there was a knock at the door and Emma did a double take. She opened the door to see Regina standing there, still dressed in the gray slacks and blue blouse she'd seen her wearing earlier that day. "You didn't just poof yourself here..."

"Where is Henry?" Her voice direct and commanding and enough to even make Emma step out of her way. Regina didn't really need directions. He was still in the bathroom.

"Mom?" His voice pulled at Emma's heart, and pulled even more when she realized he didn't mean her.

Regina looked over at Emma. "Get me a washcloth, damp with warm water."

She disappeared into the bathroom and Emma tried to hear what she was saying, but all she could hear was a mumble and something about strawberries. When she brought the washcloth in Regina began cleaning Henry's face.

"A bucket Emma. A bucket would be wise. We're in for a long night because that idiot boyfriend of yours decided strawberry ice cream would be a good idea. And judging for the rest of this any number of utterly unhealthy foods."

"You inspected the bowl?"

"Of course I did." She said this as if it was patently obvious to anyone with common sense.

Or a mother's sense, Emma was realizing.

"Mom...?"

"Bucket now, Miss. Swan. I will not have my son hugging the toilet all evening like some kind of college fraternity brother."

Emma did go to get the bucket from the cleaning supply closet but something occurred to her. "You've never been to college, where did that reference come from."

"I do own a television, Emma. And I had 28 years of time on my hands."

"I just never pictured you watching television."

"I'm sure there are many things that would surprise you. Now... where... in this place is my son sleeping?"

"Upstairs..."

She nodded glancing up the stairs, as if thinking. "Alright. Henry, do you think you can make it back up there?"

He nodded. "Emma, take the bucket. I'll be right there. I want to start some broth and get him some ginger ale."

"I'm not sure what's in the fridge."

"Well it's a good thing I know what's in mine." She waved her hands and on the kitchen counter appeared an assortment of vegetables and a six pack of diet Canada Dry. Regina handed Emma a can and for the first time she could actually see that Regina was about sixteen levels of livid. She didn't argue anymore. "Only a few sips at a time."

Emma resisted the temptation to make a snappy comeback at the order, and Regina immediately started opening drawers and looking for a knives and a pot.

Emma sat with Henry, ignoring the smell of something good coming from the kitchen downstairs. "So... strawberries?"

"Mom doesn't let me have them."

"Because they make you sick?"

"Sometimes."

"All the time." Regina said from the doorway, but came all the way into the room and sat beside him. She positioned the bucket so she could reach it easily. Emma noticed that she'd rolled up the sleeves of her blouse and not for the first time she wondered how Regina could look so put together even when she wasn't.

"He's always gotten sick right after eating them... but he likes them so he always thinks this time will be different."

"I never much liked strawberries." Emma admitted. "Your mother used to get sick when she ate them too."

"They had strawberries in the Enchanted Forest?"

Regina gave her a look as if she was an idiot. "Hey the one time I was there they served me chimera."

And this time Regina actually winced.

"You've eaten chimera?" Emma asked. "I got the sense it wasn't regular food there either."

"Diplomatic event with a representative of a kingdom where it was a delicacy. You have my sympathies."

Emma chuckled, and wondered if it was the first time she's ever honestly laughed at something Regina said. Instead she just watched as Regina stroked Henry's hair, and occasionally, and with a lot more grace than Emma could even figure out could exist in that action, she would hold the bucket for Henry. She was just starting to calm down and let the panic fade when it rose again to the surface as she heard the downstairs door open.

Regina heard it too, as she met her eyes, but didn't move. Emma went downstairs . "Hey, how was the thing..."

"The naming ceremony? It was good... are you cooking something?"

Mary Margaret asked surprised. Emma could cook, just not a wide range of things, and she followed her mother into the kitchen where she saw the pot. For a moment she thought Mary Margaret might have been impressed with that raised eyebrow and she pulled a spoon from a drawer and tasted some of the soup.

Emma watched her, slightly confused by the reaction. She seemed lost in thought, half closing her eyes before she opened them and looked right at Emma.

"Where is she?"

"Excuse me?"

"Regina."

Emma had this irrational impulse to deny the former Evil Queen was there. But she was upstairs and there was only one way out of the loft. Though... she could puff...

"Emma, remember, I grew up with Regina. You don't think I know this soup? I've been trying to replicate it for months."

"That's what all those vegetable soups were about? I just thought it was a hint about all the meat I was eating..."

"Where is she Emma?"

"Upstairs. Henry is sick."

"She's with Henry?"

Snow said quietly. Emma wondered if she was preparing to storm the stairway and wondered where her dad's sword was at this moment. Still she nodded.

"In my home?"

Emma nodded.

"The last time she was in my home she ..."

"Was trying to kill you. Yes, Snow, I think we all remember that well." Regina came down the stairs. "Emma's idiot boyfriend..."

"He's not an idiot and he's not my boyfriend."

"...Emma's moronic ex-boyfriend fed Henry strawberries."

And Snow actually winced.

"Why didn't Henry say anything?" Emma asked Regina, ignoring the obvious war going on in her mother's mind about kicking Regina out or letting her be for now.

But it was Snow that answered. "Because he likes them. I... used to do the same thing when I was his age."

"Should we bring him to the hospital?"

Regina actually gave her a look that suggested she was off her rocker. "Overkill a little? No. He'll be fine tomorrow. Some ginger ale tonight, a little hand holding, and tomorrow he doesn't eat anything but the soup."

Regina was very clearly giving orders. And Emma for once wasn't about to disobey.

"And we're going to set up real custody arrangements."

"Regina..." Snow warned.

And Regina with all the annoyance of the righteous turned to Mary Margaret. "No. You don't actually get a say in this. This... is between Emma and I because I am humoring this arrangement. But he's my son and I'm not going to let two barely functional adults play parents anymore just because you have some fantasy about one happy family."

"Regina..." Snow tried to say again.

"She's right." Emma's voice stopped Mary Margaret's argument dead.

"Good, we'll meet at our regular spot tomorrow, Emma, and we will figure something out between us."

And with all the dignity of a queen she took the bucket into the bathroom, emptied it, rinsed it and then walked back upstairs to sit by Henry's bedside.


	6. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Neal Cassidy is introduced as a character in this chapter. This is not a Swanfire fic and he will not function in any way as a romantic interest for Emma.

Regina tapped her fingers on the table as she waited for Emma. Granny's wasn't neutral ground, but at least their coffee wasn't horrendous. She had a cup sitting in front of her, half full. The wait staff didn't ever rush to fill up her cup. Their way of not encouraging her to stay.

The tables around hers were empty and a few patron's kept glancing in her direction. The Evil Queen wasn't that unusual a sight, but much like a lion or a tiger or any other kind of dangerous predator that happened to be in the room with you, it was always best to keep an eye on their location.

Emma arrived 10 minutes late, and gave her what she assumed was supposed to be an apologetic smile. "Sorry, Goldilocks got booked for B&E again last night and I had to go to her bail hearing."

"Well it's good to know the criminal justice system is back at work."

"After a fashion." Emma inhaled, "Listen... thanks for coming over the other night. I know it couldn't have been easy dealing with my mother and ..."

"Not trying to kill her?" Regina said dryly, raising an eyebrow.

"I sometimes want to kill her."

"How very un-Charming of you."

Emma gave her a look.

"You said you wanted to talk."

"Yes. Your living accommodations for my son are unacceptable."

Emma stiffened and narrowed her eyes. "I hardly ..."

"I've let you and ... that person... play parents for too long and the other day it could have been worse than an upset stomach. I called the school... do you have any idea how many days Henry's been absent this term?"

Emma at least had the good sense to look sheepish. "I'm surprised they talked to you..."

"In case you forgot, I am his legal guardian. They aren't technically supposed to talk to you. And I suspect you'll find they've not been terribly comfortable with your signing things for him anyway. Aside from the fact that that apartment is not big enough for three adults, I will not have my son sharing a room with an adult woman, even if she is his ..."

"Mother."

"Biological mother."

"I see we're granting that now?"

"I'm willing to grant the light show and the curse breaking gives you something but it still doesn't give you the right to pretend you are his mother. I'll go along with it because it's what Henry wants and I'm trying to repair my relationship with my son, but I don't really care about your feelings in the matter."

"You never did."

Regina actually felt herself growl, but she calmed herself. She and Emma had an unspoken agreement that neither talked about ... the thing... that had happened the year before. "I want to see evidence that you are planning on getting your own living space before the end of the month."

"And if I don't?"

"If you want to persist in playing little happy family with your parents, he can move back home."

"Yeah, you tried to kill us all a few weeks ago, that's not going to happen."

"Well than you'll have extra incentive to find your own space."

Emma looked like she wanted to fight some more, perhaps just for the sake of fighting, but Regina knew defeat when she saw it and decided to push further. "And I want Mr. Cassidy to make his visitation arrangements through me."

"Well, Your Majesty, it's nice to want things." Emma shook her head.

"You gave him up. You had no right to waltz back into his life. That man... what he did to you... I don't like his influence on Henry. And I certainly don't want Gold anywhere near him."

"Gold's better."

"Gold's faking, dear. He's as self interested as he always was. He wants his son, and playing happy grandfather to Henry furthers that goal." Dear was always a sign she held someone in real contempt.

"Regina, you aren't controlling Neal's visitation. Try again?"

Regina wanted to light something on fire. But she gritted her teeth and instead wrapped her fingers around her coffee mug and let the liquid heat back up to an acceptable temperature. "I want him eating better Emma. Not the way you eat. I know you eat like a 14 year old boy but 11 year old boys shouldn't actually eat like 11 year old boys want to eat."

Emma managed again to look sheepish, and Regina wondered how she managed to defuse her anger so easily with just one of those looks. But at least it seemed to be getting through.

"Oh..." Regina reached into her purse and handed Emma a bottle of multicolored gummies. "He should take his vitamins in the morning."

Emma picked them up and looked at them. "I didn't know they made Avengers candy."

"They're not a snack, dear. They're vitamins. Don't even try it." Regina looked off out a window and mumbled for the first time not using her mayor voice, "Henry likes the Captain America ones though."

And this time it was Emma looking off into space.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma was sitting in the police cruiser when Henry got out of school. Maybe it wasn't an appropriate use of town resources. She'd get a memo from Regina about it if she knew, but for some reason today she felt like she had Regina Mills Super Mom sitting on her shoulder and so she'd taken the Bug in to have its breaks fixed.

"Hey kid," Emma smiled, "How are you feeling."

"Better." He nodded happily as she started the car. "I'm sorry... maybe I should have told Dad about the strawberries."

"You should definitely should have told him, and me, about them." Emma tried to look serious to get her point across, but something else was worrying her now. "And... I'd rather you didn't call him that. Neal."

"Well... he's my father and you and he ..."

"He's the man who got me pregnant. And I want to give him a chance to be in your life... but Henry there is more to being a parent than just having a baby." And somewhere in the back of her mind that mini-Regina was cackling. "Neal is..."

Emma didn't want to badmouth him. But Henry tended to have sky high expectations of people. Which... given the adults in his life maybe that wasn't so crazy. But it royally sucked when you failed to live up to them.

Just ask Regina Mills.

She tried to clear her head. The conversation with the mayor that morning had rattled her, and she was feeling just a bit more unready to be a parent than she had the day before. And she really felt unready the day before.

"Neal is... fun to be around. And he wants very badly to do right by you. He didn't abandon you... but he did abandon me. He doesn't always make the smartest decisions and its really better if you don't put too much pressure on him to live up to too much."

"Like my mom?"

He'd been calling Regina that again since the curse broke.

"Your mom is a complicated woman."

"People keep saying that. But she is just back to evil."

"No... she's just... not trying as hard as she was before. Henry, changing yourself... who you are. It's really hard. And you can't do it without help. The thing about your mom, is she lost her way a long time ago, and it's going to take her a while to find her way back. We made a mistake. When we didn't believe her... I made a mistake," She corrected. "And it made her slip back. But that doesn't mean something in her doesn't want to be that person she promised you."

"Shouldn't you help Neal too?"

At least he started using his name. "Letting Neal find a place in your life is his path back with me. But..."

"You aren't going to get back together with him." Henry sounded desperately disappointed.

"Oh Henry... he hurt me very badly. And... being with someone is about trust. I am not sure I could ever trust him that way again."

Henry seemed to think about this, but finally nodded.

"Come on, David said he wanted to take you riding today."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was a knock on the door to Neal's room at the B&B. He half expected his father. He was the sort to show up unannounced. He muted the football game, and came to answer the door.

"Regina..."

"Ms. Mills, to you." She was dressed impeccably in a suit that he was sure he'd seen on a few high powered bankers in lower Manhattan, tailored perfectly, with a pair of heals high and pointy enough to be considered a weapon in some countries. She moved passed him as if she had been invited in.

"I thought it best we have a conversation about your time with my son."

"He's my son."

"That's... debatable." She looked at him as if she could look through him. He'd seen evil before. He had even seen evil in a parent before. But he at least never felt like his father was a direct threat to him. This woman-the Evil Queen he reminded himself people didn't get names like that without good reason, royals were often evil without picking up a prefix-she didn't have any attachment to him and in fact had good reason to want him gone. She made him just a bit nervous.

From her coat pocket she pulled out a piece of paper. "These are the rules for your time with Henry."

It was neatly typed up, on Storybrooke, Maine city letterhead. Office of the Mayor.

"You've got to be kidding about some of these. Two vegetables of different colors? And fries don't count? Does beige not count as a color? I suppose cauliflower doesn't count?"

Regina did not look like she was in a joking mood. Or knew what a joking mood was that didn't involve decapitation. "I could turn you into a cauliflower and then you could see."

He continued down the list. Bed times, a list of forbidden foods, only 3 hours of screens a day... a list of video games he wasn't allowed to play. Which ... though half of them were on his shelf he could understand most of. "Something against the Sims?"

"It isn't a good educational tool for running a kingdom."

"What?"

Regina didn't answer though. "Those are the rules, it's not a negotiation. I've reached the end of my patience for letting you and Emma play house with my son."

"I'm not sure you have ..."

"Finish that sentence and you'll learn a few of the tricks your father taught me."

Neal fell silent, but nodded. "Alright. You're the boss."

Regina smiled a wide toothy grin that reminded Neal of every con artist he'd ever known. "I knew you'd see it my way."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Neal showed up at the Sheriff's office after her shift was technically over. "Never thought I'd be visiting you in a cop station."

"At least on this side of the bars." Emma said with a bit more anger than she intended. "Is that a bottle of bourbon? I could use a drink. It was the dwarf's birthday today and for a bunch of workaholics they sure know how to throw a disruptive party."

"It doesn't help that they all hatch at the same time."

Emma was digging out glasses and paused mid-motion. "Hatched?"

"You know from eggs."

She blinked a few times, and remembered to close her mouth. "Alright than."

She let him pour the amber liquid into the bottle.

"I had a visit from Her Majesty the Royal Psychopath."

"I called her a sociopath once. I don't think it really fits. What did she want..." Emma was afraid to ask. She should have known Regina would go to Neal if she didn't get what she wanted from her. He passed her a sheet of paper and Emma recognized a memo from Regina's office. "Rules."

"What he can eat, where he can go, how late..."

"She's his mother."

"You're his mother."

Emma inhaled and sat back in her chair and shook her head. "You once told me fake it and no one will know. That's mostly what I've been doing."

"He's a good kid."

"The fact that he's a good kid has absolutely nothing to do with me... or you."

"Genetics mean something, Em." Neal ventured.

"If they meant that much he'd be a juvenile delinquent." She read over the list. "What's the matter with Civilization."

"Something about an improper education for ruling the world. That was the weirdest part of a very weird conversation. Well that and when she threatened to turn me into a cauliflower."

"Threats are Regina's way of communicating. Don't take it personally."

"When should I take it personally?"

Emma flipped over the page to read the back. "When she offers you food."


	7. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter brought to you by the word "tatting". Tatting, for just about everyone who will be unfamiliar with it is a kind of highly complex knotted lace work that is both very difficult to do and very difficult to teach. A pass time of upper class ladies with a lot of time on their hands.

Mary Margaret had been driven to distraction all week. Given the state she'd been in since... the thing with Cora... and the thing with Regina... Emma was starting to get concerned. The best way to figure out what was going on in her head, especially when she was like this, was always to ask David. So she did what people did when they wanted to get information from her.

She brought food.

It was David's turn to work the late shift and he was sitting at her... their she guessed now... desk in the sheriff's office. With Regina back in the mayor's office they suddenly had to make sure they did the paperwork a bit more reliably, she sent back a box of police reports her first week back as inadequate. David was sitting at an old electric type writer hunting and pecking out a better explanation for how a fairy accidently set Prince Eric's boat on fire. There were dwarfs involved she remembered.

"I brought a turkey club and coffee." She held up the Granny's bag. Her own lunch was a box of pop tarts in the desk drawer but he ate better than she did.

David gave a wide smile. "You are a life saver. Was Regina this bad before?"

He gestured to the pile. "A bit, but I was bit better about doing the paperwork before too. Things kind of slipped."

She sat down slumping into a chair opposite him and watched as he dug around the bag.

"Can I ask a question about Mary Margaret?"

"Sure..."

"How is she doing really. I mean we used to talk a lot and now..." there is this mother thing that I am not ready to take and she's so excited about, or was. "... it's more complicated."

David smiled. "She's doing better. Regina just... has a way of destroying her and you just have to give Snow the time to pick up the pieces again. We just have to be there for her and let her know we believe in her."

Emma grunted. She was actually sure that was probably not all she needed, but it wasn't the time for that argument. She'd tried it several times already. "Do you know what... how all of this stuff started between them?"

David shifted. "It's really not my story to tell, Emma. You should ask your mother."

She shook her head, "She wouldn't say. And Regina either, she said to ask her."

David pressed his lips together. "It was a long time ago Emma, why does it matter?"

"Well, for among other reasons we're all sitting here in Maine because of it. And for another I can't figure out what the hell is going on with either of them."

"Regina is... as she always is." David shook his head. "Maybe there is a human being under all that evil, but too many people's lives have been lost to try and risk more trying to get through to her. Your mother tries and tries but ... it destroys her every time. The last time, when we exiled her in the Enchanted Forest, she cried for days Emma. I'm just hoping she snaps out of this faster."

He picked at the sandwich and dug around in the desk drawer for a packet of mayonnaise. One of her drawers was just full of condiment packets. She might be able to supply a small country with them. "Regina wants me to move out of the loft."

He looked up sharply. "Well that's not really her place to say."

Emma shifted a little. "It kind of is... there isn't really enough room for Henry. I was thinking... the basement apartment in the building is vacant after all the dwarfs moved in together."

"It was Bashful's, so it wouldn't be too bad..." He nodded, but still seeming on guard.

"And I wouldn't be too far."

"Can you just... maybe wait a bit. Let your mother recover some more. And ... perhaps leave off that Regina is making you do it? She's helping Kathryn with her wedding planning and I think some normalcy and stability would do her some good."

Emma just nodded. "Regina just has a way of getting in your mother's head. I'd like her to be a bit more recovered before the Queen does it again."

"The Queen, really, are we calling her that now?"

"Sometimes, it's right to call a spade a spade."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma meant to catch Mary Margaret the next day to talk, but she up and out before Emma crawled out of bed, and not back until Emma had gone off to work the late shift. It wasn't until she noticed that just about everyone else in town seemed busy too that she decided to ask someone and was informed that Kathryn Nolan's wedding was taking on biblical levels.

People wanted something to celebrate and it was a chance to merge Enchanted Forest traditions with their new home. A royal wedding.

Emma wondered if she had to wear a dress to it.

Probably. She'd have to buy pantyhose. She hated pantyhose as much as she hated heels.

And apparently Mary Margaret had taken to arranging everything. Which had to be a first. Playing wedding planner to your husband's not exactly but sort of ex wife you were once accused of murdering. But then she remembered trying to explain Henry's family tree to Neal. Which hadn't exactly been helped by the booze they had been drinking.

Her thought process was interrupted on its way to crazy town by a text message. She pulled the bug over to the side of the road and frowned. "Damn it Mary Margaret..."

She turned the bug around and headed back home. She was the sheriff after all, who was going to tell her she was late. Besides Regina. She bet Regina was the one who was calling in all those cat stuck in tree reports.

Hell Regina had magic. She was probably sending the cats into the trees to start with.

Emma shook her head before she got more mental images like that. Parking in front of the building she took the stairs two at a time and entered the loft.

"Okay Mary Margaret, what do you think you are doing?"

For her part she was sitting in a chair in the corner, some Joan Jett playing on the stereo and she seemed to be working with some sort of lace doily in her lap with two silver tools. "Tatting."

She held up the doily as if that was self evident.

Emma squinted. "What?"

"Tatting. A wedding gift. It's bad luck for a royal bride not to have received something tatted for her wedding."

Moving closer Emma had to admit it looked very complicated, but not really what she was here to talk about. "You went to Regina's house today."

Mary Margaret narrowed her eyes. "How do you know that?"

"You think we don't have people keeping an eye on her these days after everything? Ruby was on watch and saw you go into her house. And thankfully come out. What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking that no one in town was likely to have any tatting shuttles except Regina."

"Wait ... what?"

She held up the two silver and ivory tools she was using to make the lace. "Tatting shuttles. I told you it's bad luck for a royal bride to not have something tatted for her."

Emma looked confused and sat down on Mary Margaret's bed. "So you borrowed them from Regina? And she gave them to you?"

"Well, Regina's really amazing at tatting. She taught me when I was little. It's very complicated and not many people can do it. It's kind of ..." Snow paused looking for the right words, "The kind of thing a princess is taught how to do."

"It's a princessy thing." Emma nodded slowly. "And Regina taught you."

"Well, she is my stepmother. And you should see some of the things she used to be able to make. I don't trust myself to try anything big. It's been too long and I was never as good as she was."

Emma was still trying to figure out what this was so important. "She could have killed you."

"Not by teaching me how to make knotted lace she couldn't."

"I mean today."

"Oh, no. She might kill me if I lose her tatting shuttles. But no she wants to see me suffer not die."

"Well that's reassuring. I'll be sure to let Henry know."

Mary Margaret shook her head. "Regina liked Kathryn. She respects the tradition. That's why she loaned me the shuttles."

"If attempting to have you murdered is how Regina shows she likes you I'd hate to know how she shows love," Emma realized immediately that she'd put her foot in her mouth at the look on her mother's face, "And there was really no one else in town you could get them from?"

"Regina loved tatting. It was one of the few things we did together that I think made her happy." She gestured at the piece in her lap. "It takes a lot of concentration and patience."

"Regina has the patience of a five year old."

"I think... perhaps Emma... you don't understand her as well as you think."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma waved to Ruby from her car as she passed the position she was staking out the mansion. She was sure Regina knew she was being watched, but at least had had the grace not to say anything about it. It was strange for Emma to think about Regina as graceful, or like those pictures in Henry's books full of feathers and weird dresses.

Or spending her afternoons by a fireplace making lace with little Snow White.

Mary Margaret had even sounded like she was lost in fond memories when she'd described it. Emma felt like she was a good judge of character, but for the life of her she didn't think she'd ever understand either her mother or Henry's.

She walked up the path to Regina's front door and used the knocker. A few minutes later Regina answered, it was late, but she was still in a suit. "A bit dressed up for a night at home."

"I had a school board meeting to terrorize."

"You go to school board meetings?"

"I'm on the school board."

"Well that would explain going to meetings. Can I come in?"

"That depends, who is Miss. Lucas going to report your comings and goings to?"

Emma shifted.

"I figured it was your doing."

Regina stepped aside but picked up a wine glass she'd obviously just put down to answer the door.

"I suppose this is about what evil I did to your mother today?"

"As far as I can tell the only evil you did was loan her some silver... thingies."

"Thingies. So articulate. Silver and ivory tatting shuttles. Wheat on one and an apple blossom on the other. My father gave them to me when I was thirteen."

"She did say you'd kill her if she lost them."

"I would."

Something caught Emma's eye behind Regina and she tilted her head before moving over to the dining room table. There was a piece of lace four times as big as the one Mary Margaret had been working on. The knot work was intricate and there was gold thread mixed in. She had to admit, when it looked like a doily in Mary Margaret's lap she had a hard time taking it seriously, but this was actually beautiful.

"Trying to one up my mother?"

Regina was watching her and shook her head. "No, that's what I made for Kathryn."

"But Mary Margaret is desperately working her fingers because she's afraid she won't have one for this stupid tradition."

"There are many silly traditions from our world, but this one is relatively harmless. I finished it before Snow asked for the shuttles."

"So why not tell her you'd already made a piece."

"I'm ... not really sure Kathryn would take a gift from me. And I wanted to make sure something got made for her."

Emma raised an eyebrow and Regina turned around to set her wine glass down. Or to deny the Savior a chance to judge that a truth or a lie.

"What do you want, Miss Swan? It's late."

"I want to understand."

"Understand what?"

"A woman who cares enough to make the fanciest doily I've ever seen for a friend she tried to have killed."

Regina turned and gave a small little smile. "Madness isn't something to be understood, Emma."

"You aren't mad."

"I am sometimes."


	8. Chapter 7

There was a knock at Regina's door as she finished rolling out the pie crust. She wasn't sure who she was making it for really. It's not like she had anyone to share it with. But it was in season and Henry had always loved it, and making it made her think of him.

She supposed he'd never eat something she baked again.

No one would.

You curse one turnover and offer one poisoned apple ...

Even she knew why no one would be eating the pie. Because no one came to her house.

The knocking persisted and she sighed, taking off the apron. It was either Emma or a lynch mob and she really didn't want to be wearing a flowery apron to greet either one. She got to the door, inhaled and schooled her expression before opening it.

And her mouth fell open just a little.

"Hello Regina." Kathryn Nolan, dressed impeccably was standing on her porch for the first time in months... since Regina had betrayed and tried to have killed the only friend she'd had in nearly thirty years. "I was hoping I could come in and we could chat."

Regina recovered her senses and nodded. "Of course. I'm baking if you don't mind the kitchen."

The blond woman smiled and nodded. "Apple pie?"

Regina raised an eyebrow.

"I can smell it... and you'd enjoy making people squirm when you offered it to them."

Regina frowned just a little and led the other woman into her kitchen. "I like apples." She mumbled.

Kathryn sat at one end of her kitchen island and Regina tied her apron on again and continued laying the pie crust. There was silence for a time, "Are you just going to stare, is this some sort of punishment?" Regina asked after it had gone on too long.

"I'm not really sure what it is. I was just... I just needed to know if it was all an act. Being my friend. Because I thought it was real and I hate the idea that I was just some sort of pawn in your obsession with Snow White."

"Everyone was a pawn in my obsession with Snow. We're in Maine after all." Regina admitted as she spooned apples into the crust. "But... you were my friend. I just..." She sighed. "I can count the number of friends I've ever had on one hand. Maybe even on Hook's missing hand because I'm not sure I should keep counting Maleficent."

Kathryn nodded. "I learned early that people who wanted to be my friend wanted my father's gold."

"Your father's curse destabilized the entire economy of the Enchanted Forest. We spent forever trying to deal with the inflation."

Kathryn chuckled. "Yeah, his advisers kept trying to tell him that. Sometimes I think his skull had been turned to gold it was so thick."

Regina didn't comment.

"I've been thinking about you since we got our memories back."

Regina didn't look over at her, but kept working.

"I know I'm mad about what you did to me. Don't mistake this conversation for me not being mad. But I keep thinking... my father was determined to marry me off to his best advantage. If he'd been alive I probably wouldn't have been allowed to marry Frederick. Not enough political advantage even though I loved him. I don't have magic, but I think I can imagine how I might have ended up like you."

Regina shook her head. "I don't need your pity."

"You don't have it. You are a powerful, dynamic woman who ripped apart a world and built a new one. You don't need pity... but I think you might need understanding." She inhaled. "And maybe... a friend."

She took something out of her purse and slid it across the kitchen counter. A wedding invitation.

Regina looked down at it. "You really don't want the Evil Queen at your wedding."

"No, I'd rather not have the Evil Queen. But I think I would like Regina. And maybe we can find out if we can be friends again."

"I tried to have you murdered." Regina said sadly.

"Yes, I actually really want to know why... was it about David and Snow..."

Regina looked away, "You said I wasn't your friend."

Kathryn looked confused, and then remembered the context. "You don't take rejection well, do you Regina?"

"Do you really need to ask that question?"

Kathryn actually laughed and reached over to take one of the cooked apple pieces she was putting in the pie and ate it. It might have been rude. Or reckless. Or a show of trust. But it actually made Regina smile a little. "Don't be late this time. And maybe something that isn't black?"

Regina actually smiles back. Just a little. "I have something for you..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She had tried to slip into the back without anyone noticing. She'd picked a lovely purple dress that she didn't think looked too much like something she'd have worn as the Evil Queen and she arrived with just enough time before the ceremony for people not to start whispering before the processional music.

They whispered anyway. She ignored them, instead focusing on the back of Henry's head sitting next to Emma five rows in front of her. At least until Anton the giant blocked that view. She considered moving but she had promised herself that she'd stay for the entire ceremony. Probably not the reception. Definitely not the reception.

Town wide parties didn't work out for her.

But Kathryn was a beautiful bride, and even Regina had to admit her knight made a handsome husband. She'd kept them apart of course, and there was a pang of guilt somewhere in her dark heart, but she had hurt a lot of people and this was hardly her biggest crime.

And she didn't really care anymore about redeeming herself to the town. That had been a pointless exercise. They would never forgive her.

But just as she had shook Kathryn's hand in the receiving line and Kathryn had given her a hug and thanked her for coming, and she was thinking about walking... not running... back to her Benz and avoiding everyone as they went to the reception...

"Mom... you came."

Henry. He was happy to see her. For maybe the first time since ... before her mother. "The bride invited me. It's been a long time since I was actually invited to a wedding so I thought I should come." She gave him a smile and resisted the temptation to reach out to touch his face. To hug him.

She'd learned the hard, heart breaking lesson that it was best to let him hug her. Because when she did he just broke away and it destroyed her. But he was smiling at her now, and that ... that might be enough.

"Are you coming to the party?" He asked with the kind of enthusiasm that she couldn't turn down. "They're calling it a ball. I've never been to a ball before."

She smiled, and lied, "Of course I was going to come to the party, my little prince. Would you consider dancing with me?"

Henry looked a little unsure. "I don't know how to dance like that."

"Oh, but I don't think it matters. I'm sure you are a natural."

One dance, she told herself. She'd stay long enough to dance once with Henry. And then she'd leave. She stayed along the wall of the town meeting room that had been converted through a lot of she was sure Mary Margaret's hard work into a space with white roses and gold accents. She didn't see it at first, but she even noticed that her wedding gift to Kathryn was being used to decorate the high table.

People were whispering of course. The last wedding she'd attended had a rather different impact. But even Snow seemed to get over the shock once Kathryn had told a few people in a slightly firmer voice than she might have otherwise used that Regina had come because she was invited and anyone who didn't want to be at a wedding with her was welcome to leave.

She got her dance with Henry. I was a simple box step mostly, but she told him how to it and they even did a (very awkward because of his height) spin. "May I break in, Prince Henry?"

She was surprised at the voice and saw Charming standing behind her. "Of course." He smiled and before she realized it she was in David's arms and they were starting to dance properly. He didn't say anything as they danced, but they dipped, and twirled and glided across the floor with the other couples. Or rather the few other couples that had not noticed the Prince and the Queen dancing enough to stop and stare.

Snow had started dancing with Henry, and after a time they were the only couples on the floor as the others gradually stopped. At least until Kathryn dragged Jim out onto the floor as well. When the music finally stopped David bowed. "You are very good Regina, you should dance more often."

"There hasn't been a lot of call for it. You aren't bad yourself. For a shepherd."

"I was bored and had a lot of time to practice with sheep." He had a twinkle in his eyes and Regina was momentarily not sure if he was serious. They parted and he, of course, found his wife on the dance floor. Regina made her way back to Henry who had found Emma in the crowd who had ringed the dance floor to watch.

"That was cool!" Henry said.

"I haven't danced in a very long time." Regina said quietly.

"You could have fooled me." Emma added.

Regina glanced at her eyes before deciding not to say anything in reply.

"I should... really go. I've been distracting enough from Kathryn's big day."

"You could stay. People stopped talking when Kathryn threatened to punch Grumpy."

"I bet your mother loved that. She's overly attached to those dwarfs."

Emma gave her a look.

"I should leave," she repeated, but she brushed a bit of Henry's hair from his face. "You need a haircut. Perhaps Emma could take you to Joe's and tell him to give you a number 5." Regina glanced over at Emma to see that she'd gotten the message. "Thank you for the dance, my little Prince."

She couldn't resist this time, she gave him a light kiss on the forehead. And this time. This time he let her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She was sitting in her back yard, a blanket wrapped around her and a hot mug of apple cider in her hands. It had been a good day. Perhaps her best day in a very long time. She'd wanted to leave before she did something to ruin it. To poison the memory. And now... now she just wanted to replay it over in her head again and again as if maybe that would erase other memories.

"Can I join you?"

It was Emma, coming around the side of the house with a bottle in her hand. Wine not whiskey.

"If you bought that at the gas station you may not." Regina said sternly.

"I did not. Swiped it from the wedding. Or rather Kathryn Nolan send me home with it. I thought maybe I'd share it since wine isn't my thing and you are the only one I know who would appreciate it."

"You are such a philistine. Let me go in and get some glasses."

Emma took that as the yes it was intended and when Regina came back she was curled up in one of the other wrought iron chairs. "That was a brave thing you did today."

"Go to a wedding?"

"Go somewhere you knew people hated you. You handle it with so much grace I had a hard time keeping my eyes off you."

"The intense stare was probably what reassured a lot of people. That the Savior was keeping an eye on the Queen." She opened the bottle and poured them both a glass before handing it to her.

"Does it always have to be about all that history? I mean, can't you all just live in this world. In the now."

Regina smiled. "The history defines who we are Emma. You said it yourself. Everyone knows what I am."

Emma shook her head. "I was an ass for saying that."

"It doesn't mean it wasn't true."

"It wasn't true."

"And you might be an ass for lying now. But the effort to make me feel better isn't unappreciated."

Regina sat down and swirled the wine before tasting it. Kathryn had excellent taste in wine.

"You saved my mother's life once. She told me."

"I did." Regina agreed.

"Would you tell me the story?"

She wanted to say no. She should say no. She'd been refusing to tell this story for a long time. Except to Snow. Because it was between the two of them.

Except it was between the three of them now, if she had to admit it.

"I was eighteen and your mother was ten. I had sneaked away from my mother to meet Daniel. He was the love of my life..."

Regina knew she had a sad little smile on her face, and she could feel the tears coming.

But she pushed on, and she told the story anyway...

Because Emma had been right. It was how it all began. And what had led them all here. And had once upon a time, a lifetime ago it seemed now, even led Emma to her bed. And Regina knew the other woman wasn't going to stop asking until she understood.

And Regina desperately needed someone to understand.


	9. Chapter 8

Emma met up with Mary Margaret at the dinner the next morning. She and David had been... busy... when she got back to the loft and it hadn't been the time to ask about what Regina had said. Emma couldn't escape the feeling that Regina Mills had a loose relationship with the truth, and she wasn't inclined to trust her account of what had happened all those years ago.

Though part of her wondered if her suspicion that Regina was a natural liar had as much to do with the fact that she had fooled her lie detector the previous year. Not that the Mayor had ever promised anything, or made any pronouncements of feelings, but Emma had started to wonder if maybe something more real than casual sex could have been built from what they had.

And then she'd gone on a sociopathic plot to frame her best friend for the murder of a woman that wasn't even dead. And that rather killed any chance for a serious relationship.

And then she'd turned out to be an evil fairy tale villain who had tried to curse her into a magical coma, which as far as crazy ex's go, put Regina Mills on the top of Emma's very long list. Not that she was about to tell that to her mother. She was rather certain that Mary Margaret would have a heart attack if she ever found out she'd slept with Regina.

"You ... look well." Emma commented.

"Yes, well, David gets excited after weddings. And fights."

"That's an interesting combination."

"Well, you'd kind of have to have been at our wedding to understand."

"The three of you were well behaved yesterday."

"The three of us?"

"You know... you, David... Regina." Emma sipped her coffee.

"It wasn't my wedding or my place to object to Kathryn's desire for her to be there. She behaved... so I don't think I can complain."

"David danced with her."

"She's a good dancer. We don't get to do that kind of dancing much anymore."

"I had a hard time imaging her doing things like that... dancing... weird lace making... it all sounds so very..."

"Medieval?"

"Something like that."

Mary Margaret smiled. "I know we all seem strange to you, you didn't grow up in the Enchanted Forest, there are just some things a lady of a certain rank learned how to do. Dancing, embroidery, lace... to Kathryn, or Regina, or I... it's a bit like driving a car or using a telephone."

Emma just nodded, and tried to slip it in casually, "I talked to her last night. After the party. She told me about the horse... is it true?"

Mary Margaret got the same far off expression Regina had had. "She wouldn't lie about that."

"There is this thing I don't get... you were what? Ten? How could she blame you for what her mother did?"

"Oh. So she told you about Daniel too."

"It took most of a bottle of wine to get it out of her yes."

"She was in love, Emma. I'm not sure we, either of us, can understand what it would be like to have your love's heart crushed in front of you by your mother."

"But she knows Cora was crazy. At least think she does."

"She's still her mother." Mary Margaret always looked guilty these days at the mention of Cora. "It was a mistake I made... Regina never trusted her mother, she always knew she was dangerous, but I didn't realize that she could not trust her and still love her."

"Are we talking about 40 years ago or last month?"

"Both maybe."

Emma shook her head a little. "Regina once told me, back when she was framing you for murder, that getting your heart broken could make you do unspeakable things."

"She would know."

"Was she ever... I don't know..." Emma searched for a word. "Human?"

That made her mother laugh, surprisingly to Emma with a certain amount of genuine affection. "Regina is... a terrible monster, capable of truly horrible things. Things I don't think you even understand Emma. But many monsters are human, and Regina is a terrible monster because she is deeply human."

Mary Margaret looked sad and into her cup of coffee. "Regina taught me some of the most important values of my life. I've tried... I've tried to live up to be like the woman she was when I met her. But... she was lost a long time ago. I waited for her to return and she never did. Now ... now I try and respect her memory by protecting everyone I can from being hurt by the shell of a woman that is left."

"That's a rather dark view of things, coming from you." Emma observed. Normally she was the fatalist.

Mary Margaret actually flinched, but shook her head. "Regina hurts everyone she touches. I'm not even sure she means it. If I could keep you and David and Henry away from her I would."

Emma stared at her for a long time.

"You've been encouraging me to keep Henry away from her."

"Where he'll be safe. Besides... you are his mother."

"I'm ..." Emma paused, searching for words. "I gave birth to him, Mary Margaret. That doesn't make me his mother."

"Of course it does."

Emma shook her head, as if having a sudden realization she should have perhaps had a long time ago. "You are afraid that if I'm not Henry's mother because I didn't raise him, you aren't mine because you didn't raise me."

"Emma..."

"There is a difference you know. Between you and me. You wanted to be a mother. I know I couldn't be. I ... I'm Henry's mother right now because he wants it and she's not in a good space for him to be living with her. But having him with me has just taught me one thing. She's his mother. I hope you wouldn't keep them apart just out of some ... vendetta from the old country."

Mary Margaret looked offended, "Emma... you don't know her like I do. She ... she's a masterful actress. She can make you feel like she loves you. But her heart is black as coal."

"I'm sure if I saw her heart it would be black." Emma said it as if the fact that she might actually see Regina Mills' actual heart someday wasn't very weird. "But I've seen her. She loves Henry more than life itself. When..." She paused, trying to decide if she even wanted to say this to her own mother given her fragile state of late, "When I was a kid in the foster system, I dreamed of having a mother who loved me as much as Regina loves Henry."

"Emma!"

"That's not an insult to you. You and David did what you had to do. I just... you can't just make me Henry's mother in hopes that you can erase those ten years she gave him. I might be his mother... but ... I think she's his mom."

Mary Margaret was stunned into silence, and Emma decided to push on...

"I don't know what she is to you, or you are to her, but the two of you need to work out your issues. Because otherwise you'll both just tear apart this town finding new and horrifying ways of hurting each other."

"I'm not..."

"Are you pretending you didn't do what you did with Cora's heart in order to hurt Regina?"

"She... you were there Emma. You know she had to die."

Emma nodded in agreement. "So why didn't you crush her heart."

"It was easy..."

"It wasn't easier to use the candle than to crush her heart."

Mary Margaret looked white as a sheet.

"You did it because you wanted to hurt her?"

"I was trying to kill Cora, of course I wanted to hurt her."

"Not Cora. You did it to hurt Regina."

Mary Margaret was silent for a very long time. "Cora killed my mother. Regina killed my father."

"Is that why there is a shadow on your heart?"

"How do you know about that? Regina told..."

"No... David did."

Mary Margaret looked like she wanted to protest, to deny, to object, but her shoulders just slumped. "I don't know how to stop the darkness, Emma."

"I wonder," Emma ventured, tilting her head to the side, "If Regina would say the same thing."


	10. Chapter 9

Emma had moved out of the loft in just one afternoon. It had taken her so little time for several reasons, the first being she was only moving into the basement apartment in the same building. For another she didn't have all that much stuff, though more than she'd had at any other point in her life. And lastly because all seven dwarfs showed up to help. Well, Sleepy found a corner to crash in, but still, it made short work of the job.

It was smaller than the loft, but Henry had his own room and it felt a bit less a 1990s designer specializing in 'shabby chic' had vomited all over the living space.

Not that she didn't love Mary Margaret, but their styles weren't exactly the same. Not that her style went all that well with designer clothing, spike heels and obsessive cleanliness. She had to admit to herself recently that she was having trouble getting Regina Mills off her mind.

The way her skin felt as she ran her fingers along it. The way her hair smelled...

"I really need to get out and date more." Emma mumbled to herself.

"Probably. You might even learn how to eat like a human being." The devil herself spoke from the open door to her new apartment. Except the Regina of reality was fully dressed rather than the one of her daydream. "Henry said you were moving today. I brought you a house warming gift."

She offered her a bottle of liquor. "No sleeping curse?"

"Only if you consume the entire bottle at once." Regina set it down on the kitchen counter and started looking around the small apartment.

"Oh, I see, this is an inspection."

"Of course it is." Regina said with a casually dismissive tone, "Where is Henry's room?"

"Second door in the hall."

The Queen disappeared down the hall before coming back nodding with approval. "A bit small, but, acceptable."

"I'm glad it had a stamp of royal approval. Does that come with a seal and a sign I can hang on the front door?"

Regina gave her a look, but stood a bit awkwardly in the middle of the room, like she wanted to say something else but also didn't. Stubborn bitch. "I was wondering if maybe... you get up early. I was wondering if you'd like to come over on school mornings and eat breakfast with Henry. Maybe take him to school."

Regina stiffened. "Is that your idea of pity, Miss. Swan."

Miss. Swan. That was never a good sign.

"No, I just... he's not ready to sleep over at your house yet. But I thought maybe we could work on fixing things."

"We? I'm so glad you are now inserting yourself directly in my relationship with my son." Regina turned, and if she'd been wearing a cape Emma could imagine it swishing behind her. As it was her trench coat did a decent imitation as the Queen departed.

Emma shook her head, let out an exasperated sigh and followed. "It's not like that Regina..."

They were out on the front walk of the converted warehouse before Emma caught up with her, grabbing her arm. Regina's arm flung out, her hand flat before she closed it and Emma wondered how close she had come to flying across the lawn. Another lawn. Again.

"Listen, I'm an idiot."

"Of course you are. This is new?"

"Regina..." She warned, only so much she'd take from this woman.

"This is why I didn't want to tell you that story. I am not some sort of Charming charity case..."

"It's not pity and it's not about that conversation..."

Regina gave a mocking sneer, "And here comes the cavalry."

Part of Emma wondered what that meant until she heard her mother's distinctive clump of heavy sensible shoes coming down the steps behind her.

Damn it.

"What are you doing here, Regina?"

"Inspecting my son's living arrangements Snow. Why don't you let the grownups talk."

"How did you know Emma had moved today..."

"Really Snow this is a small town. And I'm really not in the mood," She waved her a hand casually and Mary Margaret flew up into the air, floating about a hundred feet above their heads, flailing her arms as if she was trying to swim.

"Regina, put her down now." Emma said with a warning.

"She'll come down in a few hours on her own. As long as she doesn't hit a power line."

"Regina..." Emma had lost patience, but so apparently had the Queen.

"Or what? You'll arrest me? Cancel my next dinner with Henry?"

"Why do you have to be a dick? Why can't you be a normal person who reacts to things in a normal way?"

"Because I won't have you use Henry to make me behave."

"You were trying to be better for Henry."

"That's right. For him. Not for your family to use him as a weapon against me."

"If you'd stop being a psychotic bitch for ten minutes you'd realize I agree with you."

Regina raised her eyebrow, ignoring Snow's demands that she be let down, and focusing on Emma.

"Listen, you are an ass. Don't try and pretend you are not, that is self evident."

Emma kept her eyes locked on Regina and pointed up in the sky.

"She's drifted a bit dear. Must be a bit windier up there."

Emma blinked and glanced up, noticing that her mother was drifting a bit, she shook her head and looked at Regina. "Put her down."

"Hmmm how about no."

"Christ Regina!" Emma shook her head in frustration and balled her fist and unballed it again

Except this time it was Regina's turn to look surprised. "Nice sparks. Good power but your control could use some work."

"What?"

Regina nodded down at Emma's hand. Little sparks were coming off her finger tips. Reflexively she closed her hand again and it stopped.

"You should really take care of that Emma." Regina's voice was a bit softer. "Uncontrolled elemental magic can cause all sorts of problems."

"So can a crazy woman with controlled magic." Emma grumbled. "I don't want Henry to be part of some blood feud between our families. I just thought... he misses his mother and I thought you might like it. Breakfast and school I mean."

"You want us to play divorced mommies?" Regina asked with a raised eyebrow.

"That would require us to have been married in the first place." Emma whispered the next, acutely aware that there were now people watching them. Snow making a racket in the air above them drew a crowd. "Or for you to actually have human feelings for anyone but Henry. But for now I'll take your feelings for Henry as human."

Regina seemed taken aback by that, and calmed a bit. She straightened a bit of her hair that had moved out of it's perfect place. "Just ... come to your place, make him breakfast, and take him to school."

"Yes."

"Do I have to let your mother down?"

"That would be nice."

"So I don't have to let your mother down." She winked. "I will see you Monday, Emma. Try to be dressed at least."

"I don't have a spare key yet."

Regina laughed. "I don't need a key."

She turned and walked down the path, past the growing crowd who parted for her like the red sea.

Emma watched her go for a moment before turning her attention to her... other problem.

"Don't worry, Mary Margaret... we'll figure something out."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma and David followed Mary Margaret as she floated around town slowly in the sheriff's cruiser until Mother Superior could come up with something to help her land safely. Snow and David were understandably livid, but the truth was that in the grand scheme of Regina's crimes this was minor and Emma convinced them that she'd talk to her about it.

She didn't tell them that she was going to do that by telling Regina to stop being a dick.

Because she knew that would be about as effective as one of her mother's lectures on morality. Maybe more. Still, she wasn't quite prepared for the question when Henry posed it over a bowl of Cheerio's that evening. "Why did Mom levitate, Grandma?"

"Mary Margaret interrupted your Mom and I while we were talking."

"But why did she levitate her."

"Because she annoyed her and your Mom doesn't have very much self control."

"Was it evil?"

Emma blinked. "Was what evil?"

"Levitating Snow White. I mean she's the Evil Queen... was she trying to hurt her?"

Emma sighed. "No. She wasn't trying to hurt her. Henry... do you think maybe we could stop calling Regina the Evil Queen?"

"But she is..."

"She was once yes, but she doesn't act like she does in your book, does she?"

"No..." He stirred his cereal.

"And that book... have you ever asked her side of those stories?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, it's about heroes and villains right? Do you think she sees herself as evil?"

"Sometimes..." Henry ventured.

Emma paused at that answer, and sighed a bit. "Do you think villains think of themselves that way? You read a lot of comic books."

"No... usually they think they're right."

"And why do you think your mom thinks she's a villain?" Henry seemed thrown by the question, and Emma decided to continue. "I think your Mom has had a lot of bad things happen to her. Some she did to herself, and some she didn't. And I think she has trouble believing she can be good."

"Especially after her mother came to town?"

"Yes... her mother... her mother wanted to destroy the good in your Mom. She'd just started to believe in herself a bit and that was all taken away. I think maybe you and I ... we should try and help her remember that again. But we can't do that if we're calling her evil."

"Even if she levitated grandma?"

Emma paused, "Don't tell your grandparents this... but she might have deserved a little levitation."


	11. Chapter 10

Monday came, and as Regina had promised she didn't need a key, Emma woke up to the smell of cooking and threw on a pair of jeans and a Boston Red Sox sweatshirt mostly because despite the fact that she'd invited the Evil Queen into her home at 7AM, she really wasn't up for wearing a bra this early.

"Good morning, Regina. I see you found the contents of my refrigerator wanting," Emma chuckled as she slipped past Regina in order to get milk for her coffee. There were two large grocery bags on the counter and a half dozen or so Tupperware containers in her fridge each carefully labeled in the mayor's swoopy handwriting.

"You eat horribly. It wasn't hard to figure out that I would. There are some premade meals in there for Henry so you don't have to serve him cereal for dinner anymore."

"I haven't..." Emma tried to deny it but remembered there were still bowls from the previous night in the sink. "Yeah, thanks." She mumbled and let her get on to cooking. "How'd you get in."

"Magic."

"That's disturbing."

"Would you rather I pretend I can't?"

"Sometimes."

Henry came out of his room before too much more of an argument might be had, glancing between them, "Mom... why are you here?"

The wariness in his voice momentarily seemed to break the older woman, and Emma stepped in. "I thought you two would like it if she came over and cooked breakfast for you on school mornings and took you to school."

He looked at Emma, as if trying to decide if that was really the case, but seemed satisfied with the answer. Or at least hungry. "Omelets? With peppers and mushrooms?"

His excited question was answered by a radiant smile from Regina that Emma wondered why she didn't show off more often, rather than the perfect yet disturbing politician's one. "We can't all eat warmed over cardboard and sugar and call it a meal."

Emma looked over offended as she was about to put a pop tart in the toaster oven for herself. "I'm a growing girl."

"Do let me know when you grow up." Regina smiled.

She slid the omelet onto a plate next to a small pile of potatoes and a sausage before sliding it across the kitchen bar to where Henry was sitting. Emma felt a bit guilty seeing him dive in like a starving man, and sheepishly took a bite from her pop tart.

"Would you like some coffee?"

"Do you actually know how to make that?"

"I am, despite appearances an actual functioning adult human being." Emma paused. "And it's not that hard."

"In that case, yes. I do believe you tortured how I take it out of my secretary?"

"She held out for a long time under extreme duress." Emma noticed that Henry was watching them both like a hawk. Probably to make sure they'd behave. The fact that he had to worry about that made her feel guilty.

That was as much her fault as Regina's.

"Did your mother land safely?"

"I think you know she did, or else we wouldn't be having a pleasant conversation."

"Her feathered friends likely enjoyed the company," Regina took the coffee mug and leaned against the counter. She was already in full mayoral attire and Emma wondered how she managed to make that button look simultaneously like it was about to pop but still stay stubbornly buttoned. And then she flicked her eyes up when she realized that she was looking entirely too long at the mayor's chest.

Perhaps Regina hadn't noticed.

Who was she kidding. Of course she had. "What's with the bird thing and Mary Margaret?"

"All royalty can talk to birds, but your mother takes it to a new level."

"Wait... what?"

"Does that mean I can talk to birds?" Henry asked.

Regina smiled, "Of course it does my little Prince. It might take a little work here because the birds in the Enchanted Forest are more used to it."

Emma blinked. "You can talk to birds. I thought it was a ... you know... princess-y good guy thing."

"I am a Queen," Regina said as if it was obvious, "And my father was a prince. I was born a princess."

That particular piece of information was new to both of them and Emma raised an eyebrow.

"Talking to birds is overrated. Do you know how much they poop in your hands?"

"It's not really a piece of information I am familiar with, no..."

"I always try to wash my hands after shaking hands with your mother."

"I thought that was because you wanted to wash the goodness off."

"That too. Though you know that you can also talk to birds." The mayor leaned against the counter with her coffee mug in hand. Regina said the second as she already knew what Emma's reaction would be and was deeply amused.

Emma shook her head, "Nope, not gonna, can't make me."

"You make a terrible Princess, Emma."

"Good."

Regina left with Henry after making sure that he brushed his teeth for about three times longer than Emma did, and she was left cleaning the dishes from the morning (and the night before) when there was a soft knock on the door.

She rather guessed who it was.

"Come in, Mary Margaret."

"Good morning..."

"You saw her leaving I take it?"

"I saw her car parked outside and given she wasn't sitting in it watching I guessed she was inside. Why?"

"Because she was cooking her son breakfast before school."

Emma had actually been prepared for this argument.

"You invited her?"

"Yes, I invited her. It seemed like a reasonable step towards normalcy."

"Into your home?"

"It's not like she needs a key."

That actually made Mary Margaret shiver and Emma regretted saying it. Your mortal enemy doesn't need a key isn't exactly a comforting thought. She remembered the bar they'd installed on the loft door after the discovery of Regina's skeleton keys. Her mother still used it despite knowing it wasn't a barrier to Regina.

"Do you think it's wise?"

Emma set a mug of coffee in front of Mary Margaret.

"I think Regina and I have to deal with each other at least until Henry is an adult and it's best if we can do it on a civil basis." She hoped that would shut down the argument. Eventually her mother would have to accept that Regina had a right to be in Henry's life. "Hey... did you know Regina can talk to birds?"

"Of course she can, she's royalty." It was said with all the obviousness of pointing out that the sky was blue.

"It just... doesn't seem like her thing."

"I'm rather surprised they speak to her. When we were fighting she had entirely too much information on my location at times. I was sure that she was getting it from woodland creatures, but they'd have never told it to her willingly."

"You are accusing her of ... what... torturing small animals?"

Mary Margaret stared at her as if this was obvious, "Yes."

"Alright..."

Her mother smiled. "I guess it's just one of those things you have to grow up with."

"I guess... hey... can I ask you a question? She said something this morning, about her father having been a Prince... I guess I just always assumed she was some sort of commoner whose mother had managed to get your father to marry."

Snow shook her head, "No, Regina was never a commoner. But she wasn't always a princess. Her family lost its kingdom. Her grandfather liked fighting naval battles quite a bit beyond his skill level and Cora and Henry were exiled when she was five."

Emma frowned.

"What?" Mary Margaret tilted her head to the side.

"I was just thinking about what it must have been like. To be uprooted from your home at that age." It was traumatic for Emma every time she moved, and she wasn't a princess whose family had lost a war.

"You are still trying to understand her."

"Like I said, we'll be in each other's lives for a long time to come."

Her mother nodded. "When I was on the run from her, I used to go over in my head every interaction we'd had. Trying to figure out if there was some clue I should have had... something I should have done differently." Snow paused. "Besides telling her mother about Daniel."

"And...?"

Snow smiled a little. "I wasn't the most empathetic child. And Regina was in a lot of pain when we were living together. I think she probably still is."

She played with her cup and Emma watched her.

"You still love her." It wasn't even a thought that had ever occurred to her before. Snow White hated the Evil Queen. That seemed like a given one could at least accept from the stories.

Mary Margaret chuckled, "It would be so much easier if I didn't."

Somewhere in the back of Emma's mind she shut down a similar thought before it could even be formed.


	12. Chapter 11

Things were quiet in town for almost a week. The most excitement to be had was when Pongo got loose and Emma, David, and Archie had spent four hours chasing him all over a residential neighborhood. One could almost think that it was back to the small town where nothing happened that Emma had moved to almost two years before. Well... except it was no longer cursed and the inhabitance were all displaced fairy tale characters. But something like small town normal. She took a giant bite of her burger, double cheese with bacon when she heard a loud crash from outside.

She glanced over at Red, who nodded and Emma ran out leaving her lunch behind.

The sound of broken glass came from a few shops down the street. Leroy was pulling himself out of having obviously landed in the front window of Storybrooke Shoes. How he got there was clear a moment later when Regina Mills, her trench coat open but her eyes fixed on him was walking across the street out of the bakery across the street.

There was a look of pure rage in her eyes Emma had only seen glimpses of before. The battle of Gold's shop certainly. A couple of her foster homes had people with those kinds of eyes, but she knew that this was much more dangerous.

"Regina!"

Emma drew her gun, but with a contemptuous and casual flip of her wrist, Regina made that fly out of her hand and over the roof of the dinner.

"The Evil Queen...!" Leroy started to shout but Regina held out one of her gloved hands in a vice grip and his voice choked away and he started to raise into the air. The speed that he was starting to turn blue alarmed Emma and she moved closer, wondering if she should stay behind cover.

Everyone else on the street seemed smart enough to make themselves scarce.

"Regina, please put him down..." But much to her horror she saw that her other hand was making a sweeping motion, her fingers wiggling the broken glass in the street collected itself in the air behind her all pointed like hundreds of knives at the dwarf.

Emma was sure if she didn't act quickly he'd be dead.

"Regina, you can't do this to Henry."

The queen looked like she might contemplate turning the glass missiles on her. She'd promised herself she wouldn't use their son as a leash or a stick, but it was the only thing she had right now. "You were just starting to build something. He's been so happy to see you in the mornings. How am I supposed to explain it if you kill a man in cold blood."

Leroy was still making strangled sounds, but Regina seemed to be listening at least, and at least he was still alive for now.

"I'm not going to sit by and have my enemies disrespect me to my face."

Emma winced, and dearly wished she knew what had started this. Because it was entirely likely Leroy had said something... but then again Regina had been on the knife edge of a rage since her mother's death so perhaps it was inevitable.

"Well, than perhaps the first person who should respect you is you, Regina. Because I know this isn't who you want to be."

The terrifying monster who looked for all the world like death standing in the middle of main street.

She needed to defuse this quickly, because she'd just seen David and Mary Margaret sneaking up the other side of the street.

"Or I could just make an example, and people wouldn't make the same mistake."

Emma shook her head. "Regina... I know you don't want to be a monster. You just need to believe you can be something else. Henry wants you to be. I want you to be it for him... be the woman who he looks forward to seeing in the morning."

Emma was sure she hadn't gotten through, that she was about to watch a man die in a gruesome and painful manner, but there was suddenly the sound of glass shattering as all the splintered pieces fell from the air onto the ground. The same casual flip of her wrist that had sent Emma's gun uselessly away sent Leroy flying landing with a painful sounding thud at Mary Margaret's feet.

"Better send your dog to obedience training, Snow. The next time he barks at me I'll rip his tongue out."

Leroy wasn't moving on the ground, and David was leaning over him, "He's alive."

Emma exhaled, realizing for the first time she was holding her breath. She came up to Regina, "Madam Mayor... I need you to come with me to the police station."

"What for..."

"Can we at least pretend I can arrest you for assault? If for no other reason I don't think either of us wants Henry to think he can beat people up without consequence. Besides you can tell me what just happened here."

"I think, Sheriff Swan, I'd prefer to exercise my right to remain silent."

But Regina did let her place her in the back of the squad car, even if Emma couldn't help but feel like her dignity made it seem more like an honor than a punishment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Regina had agreed to a few days in jail, mostly because despite how annoying it was to her, Emma was right. She had an 11 year old son and she couldn't... wouldn't let him think that you could beat someone up with no consequence. She had poofed a pillow and less scratchy blanket from home, but decline to allow Henry to visit her.

He'd already seen her in jail once and she had no intention of allowing it again. Emma agreed, but mostly because they both knew she was only in the cell because Regina agreed to it. Two days into her self-imposed punishment Regina woke up to a darkened police station but the feeling of being watched.

She sat up and Snow White was sitting in a chair facing the cell.

"You're here to watch me sleep?"

Snow smiled. "I could be returning the favor."

Regina groaned, but had to admit to herself she had invited that one.

"Grumpy has three broken ribs and a bruised larynx. He won't be able to talk for two weeks."

"I'm sure that many in town will be relieved."

"Regina..."

"Snow, how do you fit both yourself, and your self-righteousness into a room at the same time..."

"You could have killed him."

"That's what I was trying to do."

"No, it wasn't." She shook her head. "If you wanted to kill him you would have snapped his neck and it would have been done before Emma could have talked you down."

"Maybe I wanted him to suffer."

"Maybe." Snow granted, "What happened? He can't talk, and no one else seems to understand what provoked it."

"There are people who understand. They just aren't willing to talk to you."

Snow seemed taken aback by that. "I know you were in the bakery, that there was some sort of scuffle between you and the baker that he stepped into..."

Regina laughed, "Oh no wonder the stories in the book read like they do if that's how people get information."

"If that's not what happened why don't you tell me."

Regina pushed herself against the wall and casually watched Snow. "You really want to know?"

"Yes, I do Regina."

"Her name is Rachel."

"Who?"

"The baker. Her name is Rachel. She was one of my dressing maids. I was quite fond of her, and made sure she had a nice life here. A business, a comfortable home for her husband and children. She always greets me as Your Majesty when she sees me, and she has special bread behind the counter for me. Your dwarf friend took offense because he thought she was ignoring other costumers to take care of me. He said something about her... and I made sure he wouldn't make that mistake again."

"You were... defending her honor?"

"Snow, she wasn't a black knight. She didn't hold anyone down while I made them lick my boots. She laced me into my corset every day. I won't stand by while someone is abused simply because they were loyal to me."

Snow was quiet for a time, but she actually smiled.

"Something funny?"

"Just thought I saw something I hadn't in a very long time."

"Don't count on it."

"Of course not. So does Rachel make good bread? I think I may need to find a regular supply of fresh bread now."

"She's very good."

The two of them sat in silence watching each other for a very long time. Long enough for Emma to walk in holding two cups of coffee and a small paper bag. "Ah... are the two of you alright?"

Perhaps she was thinking one or the other of them had hostile intentions.

"We're fine Emma. I was just leaving. You should let Regina go. I'm going to go talk to Leroy about dropping the charges."

"Shouldn't I wait until he actually drops them?"

Snow looked directly at Emma and spoke with more certainty than Emma had heard from her in a very long time. "He'll be dropping them, I promise."


	13. Chapter 12

Regina had been sitting in jail for a week, and Emma felt like she was being punished. Henry wanted to know why she was keeping her (mostly because no one wanted to tell him how badly she'd hurt Leroy) and she didn't want to speak ill of his mother to him. But what was even stranger was how mad Mary Margaret was at her over it. She knew her mother could be imperious, but it really was the first time she'd seen Princess Snow in all her glory. She'd at least had the tact not to mention that she looked like Regina when she was indignant at not having her orders followed.

The one person who didn't seem all that bothered was Regina.

She'd asked for paperwork and spent her time in the small Storybrooke jail cell doing town business as if it was her temporary office while hers was redecorated.

Emma passed her lunch to her through the bars, a salad and grilled salmon from Granny's.

"Are we done throwing a fit yet, Miss. Swan?"

"Excuse me?"

"Are you ready to let me go?"

"You nearly killed a man."

"And your mother so kindly arranged for him not to press charges."

"Regina... you went full on evil sorceress in the middle of main street!"

"Yes."

"I have no idea how or why Mary Margaret got him not to press charges, but you nearly killed a man."

"Yes."

"Can't you feel a little bit sorry like, you know, a human being?"

Emma was exasperated. Mostly because she had started to think she understood this woman. Maybe even liked her. Maybe even felt something... else. And then she had to go ruin it...

"Because I'm not?"

"Sorry or a human being?"

"Both?" She asked casually, opening the bag and starting to take out the containers.

Emma slumped down in a chair at one of the desks facing the cell.

"You are."

"Sorry, or a human being?" Regina asked amused, "because I can assure you I'm not the least bit sorry."

"A human being. You are a good mother, you adore Henry, you are even sitting in that jail cell entirely because you want to show him there are consequences for actions and to set a good example." That had been part of the argument Mary Margaret had used. That the cell didn't hold Regina, she was just choosing not to leave it. "Which by the way, implies you know what a good example is and it's not choking a man to death in the street because he annoyed you."

"Dwarf."

"That doesn't make a difference."

Emma was actually losing her temper, made only worse by the fact that Regina seemed deeply amused by it. "I was teaching him a lesson. A well overdue lesson."

"Regina you aren't a thug."

"No, I'm a queen, and a powerful sorceress. And I'm not going to have the people in this town think I'm going to take their abuse."

"It's not your kingdom. You don't have the right to teach that kind of lesson."

"Really Princess? And you have the right to hold people when there are no charges against them?"

"Don't call me that."

"But isn't that how you have the right to hold me?" Regina put aside the budget figures she had been reviewing. "Or is this because you are still mad about me sleeping with you."

"You pointed out once we didn't sleep much."

Regina smirked.

"Do you imagine that it gives you power over me?"

Regina smiled and stood from the cot and walked up to the bars, as if Emma were the one in the cell and not her. "If I remember correctly, you certain liked to call out my name. And you did ask to be punished once. In front of the entire town."

Emma balled her fist. Alarm bells were going off in the back of her mind. Regina was baiting her.

"Why do you have to be such a colossal bitch, Regina?"

"Because you need to stop trying to get into my head."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want you there. I don't want your pity anymore than I want Snow's. I don't want you to sit there and think, 'poor Regina, what a hard life she's had, look how weak she is.'"

Emma blinked. "Weak? You are afraid of looking weak?"

"I'm not weak."

Emma actually laughed. "No, you are crazy, and sometimes delusional, but that's one word I'd never use to describe you."

"Even after I fell back in with my mother?"

Emma tilted her head to the side. "Projection."

"What?"

"You're projecting on me what you think yourself. You are judging yourself for what you did out there in the street. Know you over reacted, Your Majesty?" Regina stood at the bars, stony faced. "Mad at yourself for falling for your mother's tricks again?"

"What would you know about mothers?"

"You tried that card on Mary Margaret. Works better coming from a stepmother to her stepdaughter I think."

"I was not her mother."

"No. Your monster of a mother murdered hers."

"And your monster of a mother murdered mine."

"Projecting."

"You want me to be something I'm not Emma. You want me to be Regina Mills, small town politician with delusions of power you can mock. A lover whose secrets you can tease out of her after sex. I'm not that. I am far worse than that. I'm a monster. And I've killed. And I'll kill again."

"And you are standing in that cell because you want your son to learn better values than you did. It seems to me that you are punishing yourself for what you did as much as I am." Emma smirked. "And I think that might actually be remorse."

The queen stood erect. "It is not."

"Of course it's not."

She took the jail cell key out of her desk drawer and walked over and unlocked it. "You are free to go, Madam Mayor. Please do try not to nearly kill someone next time you need to prove to yourself that you are in control of your life."

Regina was almost growling as she picked up her overcoat and headed towards he exit.

"Regina?"

"What?"

"I'm not going to stop trying to find out who you are under all that anger."

"Miss. Swan, the anger is all there is."

Emma just shook her head. "If you are quick you can probably get to the bench before he gets out of school. I'll see you Monday morning for breakfast."


	14. Chapter 13

It was late and Ruby was holding down the fort at the dinner by herself. There was only one customer and Emma wondered if she'd be shoo'd out the door soon so that Ruby could close early.

"Should I get you a room in the B&B, you don't look like you are in shape to drive home."

"I've been drinking hot chocolate?" Emma said incredulously.

"I know, but I make a mean hot chocolate." She gave a wolfish smile.

Emma gave her a dirty look.

"Need an ear?"

"No... yes... maybe."

"Well that's always a sign. Your mother or his?"

"Hmmm?"

"Snow or Regina. Regina nearly killed Grumpy last week and Snow let her out. That is a good marker for them beginning one of their weird phases."

"I'm not sure I'd call it weird so much as it's that Regina is a complete ..."

"Big ball of crazy?"

"Something like that."

"Is this breakfast? Waking up to her every morning in your place must be strange."

"It's only school mornings, and actually she's not bad at breakfast. Kind of sweet actually, with Henry."

"And you."

"I'm there but it's not like it's breakfast with me. I mostly try and stay out of their way."

"So what is it."

"She called me princess."

Ruby smiled, "Technically I think that's true." Emma gave her another look and the waitress held up her hands, "Don't look at me I'm just pointing out facts."

"She went on this ... imperious rant about being a Queen and not taking shit from anyone. How I wanted to get in her head and make her small and weak."

Ruby chuckled.

"What?"

"Emma, you know I'm not one to judge."

"What?"

"I told you, she's not unattractive, and I ate my boyfriend once, and slept with Whale..."

"You slept with Whale?"

"I'd say we were cursed, but actually we weren't. I thought better of it in the morning."

"Okkkay." Emma said slowly.

"Like I said, I'm not one to judge you sleeping with her but do you really want to get back on that crazy train?"

Emma blinked, "Regina and I have been over longer than I knew she was the Evil Queen."

"You do spend a lot of time thinking about her."

"And she spent how many years obsessed with my mother? I'm starting to think that's normal in the Enchanted Forest."

"Well, we do all aspire to true love, and have you actually met your parents to know what that's like?"

"She never noticed?" It was a seemingly random question without context.

Except it had all the context in the world. Ruby smiled. "Your mother is a beautiful person. We let her think she's got a lot of empathy and ability to read others. Because who wants to break Snow White."

"Regina?"

"We are back to the ball of crazy."

"I just don't understand. We were finding something good with Henry. And then she had to go all Evil Queen on main street..."

"... to be fair, and I can't believe I'm being fair to her, she is the Evil Queen."

"And she isn't even sorry about that. And she wanted me to know she wasn't sorry about it. She rubbed my face in her complete lack of sorry."

"Again... she is the Evil Queen."

"But Ruby, I don't think she is. Well she is, but I don't think that's all she is. There were these moments, after the sex and before the 'I loath you's that she was actually nice. Even funny. And I just want to know that woman."

"When you are a monster it's sometimes hard to believe anyone could love you, even the parts of you that aren't."

"You aren't a monster Ruby..."

"I may not like Regina, but I admire her ability to admit that about herself."

"You did hear me when I just said you aren't a monster."

"Emma, you've never seen wolfstime. And you've never seen the Evil Queen."

"I think I got a pretty good view of her the other day, and when she was with her mother."

Ruby shook her head. "... and you've never seen what goes on in her head. Sometimes it's easier to make people go away rather than risk hurting them."

"You think she was pushing me away?"

"You know her better than I do."

"I don't know her at all."

"I'd wager that other than Henry and Snow you might know her better than anyone alive. Oh... and Mr. Gold. But him knowing you as well as he knows her can't mean good things."

"She told me to be careful of him."

"Always good advice."

Emma was quiet for a time, "Rubs... why would you push someone away who was trying to understand you?"

Ruby smiled sadly, "I can't speak for her, but I've done it myself when I was worried that I might hurt them."

Emma shook her head and chuckled.

"What?"

"I fell for it."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma handed her the cup of coffee, on the side was scrawled Regina, "Your Holiness," she greeted as she sat down on the bench in their afternoon ritual of politely stalking Henry while he played after school.

Regina turned her head slowly with an icy glare. "I am not the pope, Emma."

"Well, I'm not used to dealing with a self important queen, so forgive me while I get used to the right etiquette."

"A queen can't be self important. She is important by virtue of the fact that she's a queen."

"Hey, doesn't your name mean queen already?"

"My mother was determined."

"Queen Queen?"

"I can light you on fire Emma."

"You never did tell me how you don't set your clothes on fire when you do that."

"I don't set my clothes on fire because I know what I'm doing."

"Professionalism in magic. Right."

"It's not something you dabble in, Emma. And you are going to have to deal with yours sooner or later."

"Later or later is more like it."

Regina shook her head and turned to stare at her, "Why are you so determined to waste your ability?"

"Henry was right. Magic makes good people do bad things."

"And bad people as you pointed out."

Emma shook her head, "I was a gigantic ass for saying that to you."

"In front of my son."

"I've got a talent for putting my foot in my mouth sometimes. Just like you've a talent for self sabotage."

Regina didn't give a snippy reply, instead she turned her head back to watching Henry.

"No argument?"

"I try not to argue with people who I agree with."

Emma wanted to push, but instead she just stared at her. Sometimes Regina said things that just made you want to slap her, and sometimes she said things that just made you want to kiss her, but usually it was things that made you just want to tilt your head and ask, 'what are you thinking?'

"I'm not going away."

"I think I figured that out last year. A little late."

"You can't just push me away."

"Can't I now?"

Regina stood up, buttoning her coat. The armor is back on, Emma thought sadly.

"It wouldn't hurt so much to let me help."

"Your help is the last thing I desire, Miss. Swan."

Regina turned around imperiously and walked back towards City Hall.

Emma shook her head, whispering, "Beautiful crazy bitch."


	15. Chapter 14

Diner with Henry had been Neal's idea. A chance to have something like normal bonding time rather than be the cool visiting parent. Emma wondered idly if Neal's sudden desire for normality had anything to do with their son's daily breakfasts with his other mother and how that seemed to be drawing them closer. Maybe that was uncharitable. The truth was neither he nor Emma knew that much about being normal parents... well even about having a normal family. Part of her found the idea that her model for this might be Regina both horrifying and ironic.

But they'd had a good diner, it might even have been the most comfortable she'd been with Neal since he'd moved to town that didn't involve a lot of alcohol. The evening had been so nice that when Regina arrived-precisely at 8 when they had arranged-to pick up Henry she didn't even resent the woman. Regina had asked if Henry could sleep at home for an evening. Despite Emma's decision not to try and stand in the way of reconciliation between Henry and his other mother, her first instinct had been to say no. Regina was after all, despite her behavior with Henry, still Regina. She was still a megalomaniac who felt entitled to treat everyone-except for Henry Emma reminded herself-like garbage not worth her time.

Including Emma most of the time. And Emma herself tried not to think too much about the times she didn't treat her like garbage.

"I'll pick him up at noon tomorrow."

Emma said meeting Regina's eyes. It was their first exchange and she wanted to make sure the Queen understood the ground rules. She was glad she had Neal here for this to back her up. As limited as his backup actually was. The truth was it was more her parents, who had decided that tonight was a good night to eat at Granny's too. She was sure that was entirely coincidental.

"I understand the terms you've set." Regina bristled.

"Mom, can we get ice cream before we go home?"

Regina seemed to hesitate but instead of objecting to the sugar she just smiled. "How about some sorbet instead?" Henry grinned like he'd won some major victory and Emma felt guilty realizing that he probably had with Regina. Maybe she should start thinking about sugar...

Neal had never taken his eyes off the mayor, Emma had noticed, like he was expecting her to do something evil at any moment, her son there or not. But Regina was on her best behavior and Emma put her arm through his. "Come on, I'll buy you a beer."

Neal took his eyes off his son's adopted mother and gave a crocked smile to Emma.

She was still thinking about Regina when they left the dinner, and Neal stopped them on the sidewalk outside. "I wanted to thank you Em. This was really great."

"He's a great kid."

"He is. We did good."

"I'm not sure we had much to do with it."

She saw him frown just a bit, but he looked into her eyes, and leaned in to kiss her. She was in shock at first and it took her a moment to realize what was happening and push him away... hard. "What the hell, Neal!"

"I just thought..."

"Thought that bonding with Henry was a way to get back in my pants?!" All the betrayal of 12 years ago was swimming through her head. "Did you seriously think that you could pick right back up where we'd been before you abandoned me to go to jail?!"

Her anger was building, but she didn't care, and she didn't notice Regina and Henry exit the dinner and stop short.

"Henry, I need you to go back inside."

At least someone was willing to respect her boundaries Emma thought bitterly. She didn't notice Regina's hand move Henry so that he was standing behind her rather than to the side of her. He didn't go inside of course. When did Henry do what he was told.

"Emma, I need you to listen to me very carefully. You need to calm down." Her voice was calm and she was walking very slowly towards her. Neal was frozen in place, probably waiting to be slapped.

"Regina, stay out of this."

"Emma, you need to calm down and close your hand."

"Why!? Why can't I have the angry fit I deserve? Why do I have to be the perfect little Savior all the time?"

"You should be able to have an angry fit, but I need you to calm down now and close your hand."

She was closer now.

"Why?"

"Because you are about 20 seconds from setting your clothing on fire."

Emma looked down at her hand and there was a ball of fire glowing there. It was not like Regina's, contained and controlled, but rather more erratic looking.

"What the FUCK!?"

Regina was still speaking in an unnervingly calm voice. "It's decent for a beginner but that fake leather jacket of yours is about to go up in flames."

Regina reached gently for her hand and closed it. The flame went out.

"Emma, what was that..."

"Mr. Cassidy, I suggest you leave before I set you on fire. And it won't be an accident," Regina said with a low warning tone.

"Em..."

"Now."

He knew a command when he heard it and Neal went towards the B&B, glancing back all the time.

"Mom what was that..." Henry sounded frightened. He'd already lost one mother to magic, and he didn't want to lose a second. Emma was supposed to be the good guy...

"It's alright Henry, Emma just got mad, and she's going to go back into the dinner and have her werewolf friend make her some tea and get some sleep tonight."

Regina let go of Emma's hand, and winced a bit. "Oh my god, I burned you."

"It's nothing I can't heal."

"What the fuck..."

"Language, Miss. Swan. I told you that you can't ignore your magic."

"I ..."

"Tea." She ordered. "Come on Henry..."

She held out her burn free hand to Henry and when he took it she started to walk with him away from Emma.

"All magic comes with a price, Emma. Even denying it." The Queen said without looking back.


	16. Chapter 15

Henry had stayed the night and Regina had even managed to resist the temptation to watch him sleep, she had gotten up once in the middle of the night to make sure he was there, her nightmares about losing him had so dominated her sleep of late that it was nice for at least one night to be able to get up and see him peaceful in his bed. Especially as he wouldn't be there the next night. He let her make him waffles and they talked about the day he was going to have.

David was teaching him to ride, and a part of Regina was jealous and angry because that should have been something she shared with her son. But that was her fault she knew. She hadn't ridden since the curse. Rumple might have mocked her first sacrifice, but it had been a real one to her.

Henry ran out the door a little too fast, and without a hug or a kiss goodbye, and Regina tried not to be hurt by that. She was cleaning the kitchen in her usual Saturday routine when there was a knock at the door. Grumbling at being put upon she washed her hands and straightened her hair before facing what could certainly be another angry mob for whatever of her sins they decided to call to account today.

After all, no one else came to her door but angry mobs.

And Snow.

"What are you doing here?"

"Hello Regina."

"Go away."

Of course she didn't. Because Snow White never does what others wish.

"Emma told me about what happened last night."

"Well, it's good to know that she shared some of it. One hopes that Mr. Cassidy learns to keep his lips to himself."

Snow looked confused, and Regina realized that was not what Emma had told her mother.

"The fireball was an inevitable result of her growing magic and your daughter's anger management issues."

Snow raised an eyebrow. "You are going to judge someone else's anger issues?"

"Shouldn't I know better than most? Now, what do you want?"

"I wanted to talk."

"We're doing that, and soon we won't be when you go away."

"Please, Regina, can you just let me come in and talk about the magic?"

"Why?"

"Because Emma told me she thinks you saved her life last night."

"An exaggeration. I just stopped her from setting herself on fire."

"Close enough for horse shoes. Please, Regina. We could talk once."

"And look what talking to you did for me."

Snow gave her a desperate look and she sighed, stepping aside to let the younger woman in. "You said that her magic has been growing?"

"You haven't noticed the sparking between her finger tips I take it? Or the increased numbers of maintenance requests for things in the Sheriff's office?"

"I figured that was Emma being ... well Emma... she once destroyed my toaster while failing to make toast."

"And this is the woman feeding my son. Lovely."

"Regina."

"What do you want?"

"Her magic... is it like yours?"

Regina bristled. "In what way?"

"Well, she made a fireball when she was angry..."

"Emma's magic is elemental. A part of her as much as her stupid bravery and her innate ability to trip over things. Once she started to use it, it was inevitable that it would manifest more and more. I told her she needed to find some training."

"But it's not dark."

"Like mine?"

Snow looked down and then back at Regina.

"Dark magic is all I know. Perhaps Emma will learn something different."

"I was going to speak to the Mother Superior after I spoke to you."

Regina let out a bitter laugh. "Pardon me Snow, I think I need a drink if we're going to continue this conversation."

"What...?" Snow followed, of course she did, as Regina went to her sideboard and made herself scotch and rocks.

"Magic is not interchangeable. Asking a fairy to teach a sorceress magic is like buying a beautiful half million dollar Lamborghini and then asking your friend Billy Bob to teach you to drive it because he's got a big rig. After all they both have wheels."

"But the Blue Fairy is ..."

"Got her own agenda, one I'd love to know given her interest in your life, but my point is that fairy magic requires wands and dust. All she can do is teach theory and honestly probably not that very well given her ridged moral judgments."

"Having a moral code is not a failing."

"How's that black spot feeling lately, Snow?" Regina was satisfied when Snow had the good grace to at least look embarrassed. Still, she did see the problem, "The fairy may be able to at least stop her from being a danger to herself. Just keep her away from Gold."

"He taught you."

"And that alone should keep you from letting your loved ones anywhere near him."

Snow's head tilted slightly to the side and Regina took the opportunity to take a large gulp of her drink. She wouldn't get drunk today, she promised herself, unless Snow stayed much longer.

"Your hand..."

"Yes?"

"It's bandaged."

"Yes..." Regina raised an eyebrow.

"Emma said she hurt you... but that you could heal it."

There was almost an accusation in her voice.

"It's a magical wound. It'll have to heal on its own."

"You lied to her." There was less of an accusation in that strangely...

"She was in a very dangerous state, it was better to get her calmed down rather than to make her feel guilty."

Snow tilted her head again.

"You are staring at me."

"Oh... right. I should be going."

"You should have been going when you first showed up."

"It's good to see you too Regina."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Em... please let me in?"

Neal had been knocking on the door for five minutes.

"I take it not answering the phone wasn't a hint?"

He startled and turned to see the Evil Queen standing there with a bag of groceries in her arms.

"It's really none of your business."

"Only in that you are standing in the way of me stocking her refrigerator. Move, Mr. Cassidy."

"She's not answering the door."

"She's not home you idiot."

When he did move from the door she waved her hand and the lock opened.

"You know walking into her apartment uninvited is creepy Regina."

"Miss. Mills or Mayor Mills."

He rolled his eyes.

"Careful, you make that face too often it will stick that way."

"Do mothers really say that?"

"Evil Queen's do."

She walked into the apartment knowing he'd follow. She ignored him and began to put vegetables in Emma's refrigerator.

"What is your game?"

"Game?"

"With Henry."

"He's my son."

"Yeah, okay, I accept that." He knew enough about this woman not to challenge her on that if he liked his life, "But what are you trying to get out of it?"

"What?"

"What's the power game?"

To his surprise she just started laughing and it didn't sound like a canned evil laugh of evil. "Your father's son aren't you."

He stiffened. "At least I'm not an Evil Queen."

"And I'm not Rumplestiltskin," she was actually smiling.

"You were his student."

"I was."

"So what's the power game..."

She just smiled. "Your father didn't pick me as a student because I was just like him, Mr. Cassidy. He picked me as a student because he needed me to be a monster so he could find you. Thank you for that."

"Wait... what?"

"No one explained to you the lengths he went to get to you?"

"Well... there is this town..."

"He wrote the curse and gave it to me to cast. I cast it so it's my curse, but his plan." She gave him a sweet smile that this time didn't reach her eyes. "I'm sure I'm not the first woman whose life your father has destroyed in order to get what he wants. It's no wonder he's so taken with the library mouse of a girlfriend."

Neal looked away. He didn't want to give this woman the satisfaction of seeing him think about his mother. "Belle seems to be a good influence on him."

Regina chuckled. "On the Dark One? She's pretty I'll grant you, but your father doesn't like strong people in his life..."

"... because it reminds him of how big a coward he is."

"Ah, not as stupid as I thought."

"Thanks..."

Neal shook his head and part of him wondered what had gone on between his father and his son's other mother. And part of him never wanted to know.


	17. Chapter 16

Emma was sitting at her desk in the Sheriff's office, staring intently at a quarter sitting in a cleared off space. The book that Mother Superior had given her was open beside her, including the roughly translated pages. She'd been at this for forty-five minutes and nothing had moved.

"Careful, Emma, if you continue doing that you might accidentally defecate in your pants." She didn't need to look up to feel Regina's sneer.

"I don't need the commentary on how I'm a horrible sorceress from the local magic nerd."

Regina smiled a little. "You aren't a horrible sorceress Emma, you are just working with inferior tools."

She walked in and placed a stack of paperwork on the corner of Emma's desk and before Emma could yank it out of reach she picked up the magical theory book.

"Really?"

"I take it that it doesn't meet Her Majesty's approval?"

Regina sighed. "Frustrated are we?"

Emma stared at her and moved to take the book out of her hand, but Regina moved it out of her reach.

"Emma... magic is emotion. This method of teaching you won't let you move a speck of dust much less that coin."

"I take it you are about to tell me I should get really angry and blow things up with my mind?"

"It can be very satisfying." Regina granted. "And you could probably use a chance to get mad away from your perfect parents."

"The Blue Fairy says I need to avoid doing magic while angry."

"The Blue Fairy wants to make sure you don't have any tools she can't control." Regina leaned against the doorframe and folded her arms.

"What do you care?" Emma asked angrily.

"I care about watching you waste your ability because your family insists on putting you in a box that never fit you, Emma." Regina said with a sigh.

"Of course you'd make it about my family." She rolled her eyes. "Going to make fun of my mother now?"

"Your mother is... an idiot... but not without her redeeming features." Regina grumbled.

"Was that a compliment? To my mother?"

Regina growled, "Don't push it."

"What do you want?"

"To burn this entire town down and take my son away from all of you people. But I'm being a good girl now."

"You are not nor have you ever been a good girl. You aren't even trying to be good these days, except for Henry. Or have you forgotten nearly killing a dwarf the other week."

"I don't have to live by anyone else's standards of good."

Emma rolled her eyes, "She says to the sheriff."

"You have to deal with me as I am."

"Has it ever occurred to you Regina, that you might actually like yourself a bit better if you weren't such an asshole."

She got up from her chair and yanked the book out of her hand and put it the top drawer of her desk. She didn't see Regina following her and when she turned around the mayor was standing within inches of her. She took her hands in hers.

"Magic is emotion. Anger, happiness, love... hate. Any emotion except frustration." Regina wrapped her hands around Emma's. "Calm down and try and clear your mind. It shouldn't be that hard, there isn't much in there."

"I'm not sure that kind of comment is supposed to help me calm down." Emma observed.

"Shut up and focus." The queen ordered.

Emma found her breathing slowing, and she closed her eyes, feeling the softness of Regina's hands. "Now I want you to think about Henry. About... what is like to see him playing with the other children after school. How it makes you feel."

She opened her eyes and saw the coin scouting across the desk top.

"Are you doing that?" She asked Regina.

The other woman just smiled and shook her head. They were standing within inches of each other, it wouldn't take much to lean in and ...

"Regina what are you doing here?" David's voice was harsh. He was standing in the office door, a bag of lunch and two coffees in his hand. The quarter went flinging across the room missing his head barely and embedding itself in the wall behind him. "Hey..."

"I was attempting to limit the damage the meddling moth was doing to your daughter's talents." Regina let go of Emma's hands and stood erect again. "Your budget figures are unacceptable. And we're not buying you more ammunition until our new un-elected co-sheriff gets himself actually certified to carry a gun."

David rolled his eyes. "I've mostly been pointing it at you. I'm pretty sure you don't get to cut me off from bullets."

"The fact that you keep pointing it at me might suggest I should."

"You are a villain."

"I'm not the one who shot out the window of Little Miss Moffat last week."

"That was an accident," David protested.

"Precisely my point." Regina swept out of the office imperiously, and something in Emma wanted to follow. But instead David was handing her a cup of coffee.

"Your mother was too generous to let her continue being mayor."

"Idle hands, is I believe what Mary Margaret said. Besides, if she's torturing us over budget figures it means she's not tormenting Belle French for the fun of it."

She sat back down at her desk. "That smells like a burger..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma hadn't been able to get her run in with Regina at the sheriff's station out of her mind. Really she hadn't been able to get the brunette out of her mind at all, and seeing her five mornings a week in her kitchen wasn't helping any. It wasn't that they ate breakfast together. She ate breakfast with Henry, and Emma sometimes watched them munching a pop tart. And maybe a little jealous of the ease that Regina slipped into what she had started to call 'mommy mode'. It wasn't that Henry always did what she said, but he always listened to her, which Emma didn't always feel was the same for her when she was trying to set out rules.

Henry was over at the Tillman's house for the evening, probably learning horrible behavior from Paige, though she was less of a holy terror now that her father was around and remembered who he was. Emma found herself in the liquor store debating between tequila and vodka when she found herself wandering over to the wine section and picking something out a bit more expensive than she would normally get.

The same brand that Kathryn had sent her home with from the wedding. The kind Regina had approved of. She drove over to the mansion without much thought, almost on auto pilot. This was, of course, a bad idea. Regina was always a bad idea when she was in Emma's head this way.

At least this time she was unlikely to be plotting her murder by poisoned apple thingie. Well, less likely.

When Regina answered the door she seemed surprised to see Emma. And Emma was a bit surprised herself. The mayor seemed different, and it took her a few moments to realize she was several inches shorter.

She wasn't wearing shoes. Regina wore heels when other people would be in slippers. Hell she'd even worn heels when she had a sprained ankle.

"It's been a long day, Miss. Swan."

"For both of us." She held up the bottle. "I thought maybe ..."

She didn't finish the sentence. Regina moved out of the doorway and allowed her in.

"Thanks."

"Only because you didn't pick a terrible wine."

"I debated one of those boxes but the quark seemed more romantic." A voice in her own mind screamed at her for saying romantic. Regina just raised an eyebrow. "I wanted to thank you for your help today."

"It wasn't anything."

"I moved the quarter. It's better than I have been doing."

"I told your mother not to go to the fairies." She shook her head with contempt.

"She didn't want to, but there isn't anyone else except for you and Gold. And she said I should under no circumstance go to Gold."

"She's right." Regina seemed smugly satisfied at that.

"And it's not like you would teach me."

Something impossible to identify crossed Regina's eyes. She took the bottle and headed to the kitchen. "Henry at Hansel and Gretel's?"

Mom conversation. That's what Regina defaulted to when she didn't want to talk about something these days with Emma.

"Yeah, what do you have against them anyway."

"They don't listen to instructions." But there was something else in her voice. Regret? Sadness? Loneliness.

"Regina..." Emma put a hand on her arm before she started to open the wine bottle. "Thank you for your help today."

"It was nothing."

"It wasn't." She looked into the other woman's eyes. She could feel the queen's breath they were standing so close. And then they were kissing. Not the angry possessive kissing that had quickly lead to other things in the past. Soft, lingering, exploratory but hesitant...

When it broke Regina leaned forward to catch her lips again, but only managed to capture her lower lip for an instant before she looked down.

It was the queen who spoke first. "That was a mistake Emma... I think you should leave."

"Regina..."

"Now." She ordered, and then amended. "Please."

Emma left the wine, and the house, unsure of what had happened and why Regina seemed to want it so badly when it was happening, and be so dead set against it once it was over.


	18. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Please remember, this is late season 2 Regina, not the redeeming/redeemed Regina of recent seasons.

Regina was leaning against the fence rail watching as Henry went around the ring on his pony. She had to admit, David hadn't done a horrible job teaching him basic horsemanship, and the mount wasn't compete trash.

"Relax, Henry, let your body move with the horse..."

He nodded, "Okay Mom."

She didn't give much advise, trying to remember her boundaries these days. The more she remembered them, the more he seemed to want her in his life. She heard the sound of tires against gravel behind her, but didn't turn, the stables were a busier place now that everyone remembered they came from a horse culture.

"He looks a lot more relaxed up there than I would be."

Emma. The sound of her voice made her jump, and she forced herself to relax, "I'm sure your father would be more than willing to teach you."

She chuckled, "Probably, but his method seems to start out with a lot of brushing."

"You are lucky. Mine would start out with mucking."

"You mucked stables?"

"My mother wanted a queen, but not a lazy one," Regina retorted. She didn't turn to look at her. It was better that way. She'd know what her feelings for Emma were for a long time now, and knew that they weren't something that could be acted on. It had been one thing to dominate the Savior in bed. A kind of victory. As it turns out the only kind she got. It was an entire other thing to feel...

"Are we going to talk about the other night?" Emma asked quietly, taking up a place besides Regina watching their son.

"Not only are we not going to talk about it, but we're going to forget that it ever happened."

Emma shook her head, "I see. Tell me Regina, were you always such a moody bitch or is it something I bring out?"

Regina closed her eyes. "You don't want anything to happen between us, Emma. You really don't. It's in everyone's best interest. End of subject."

Emma looked like she wanted to argue, but she perpetually looked like she wanted to argue. Thankfully she chose not to this time. "Mary Margaret says you are a really good rider. Why don't you do it here?"

"Mary Margaret exaggerates. She was just a horrible rider."

"Again without the random Snow White hate?"

Regina sighed, "I liked to ride. It was, I think, the only time I was truly happy."

"During your marriage to my grandfather, or when you were younger."

"I would prefer if you didn't refer to him as your grandfather around me. I'd prefer not to think about the King at all." Regina said with a quiet tone. Emma raised a curious eyebrow but said nothing. For once. "But the answer to your question is probably both. On a horse... I was free."

Emma tilted her head to the side. "That doesn't explain why you don't ride here. I'm sure Henry would love to have something to do with you. He's been asking David about jumping... it seems ... dangerous."

"Not especially." Regina shrugged. "I wanted a clean slate. A fresh start. I really haven't done much of anything I enjoyed back in the old country."

"Horses or fancy doilies?"

"Lace, Emma, a lady does lace work. Some day your mother is going to trap you into princess lessons, lace and dancing and talking to birds."

"Yeah, I'm still not talking to birds, I don't care what you people say."

"You could use them for work. They'd be cheaper than a deputy." Regina smiled and it reached her eyes.

"Always an eye on the budget, bird seed?"

"Think we could pay your father in bird seed?"

"My mother might not object." Both women genuinely laughed together for the first time in ... a long time if not forever.

Emma leaned against the fence and watched Henry. "You should ride again, Regina. You didn't get your clean slate you should at least have something you enjoy."

"Why do you care?"

"Maybe I like to imagine you would be less of an asshole?"

"Imagine all you want, Sheriff."

She pushed away from the fence.

"Good day, Your Majesty."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Regina's secretary, a sweet woman named Linda that Emma had a hard time imagining working for the Evil Queen, called over and said that the Mayor would like to discuss a budget request. Emma smiled a little, having some idea what it might be. When she put it in she expect to get a simple "no" by email, or if she was really lucky a long diatribe hand written in the memo's margins in Regina's swoopy beautiful handwriting. A few times, before the curse broke, she used to tease her about it, asking if she had sat up long nights as a teenager practicing.

It became less funny after meeting her mother and deciding that young Regina probably had stayed up long nights practicing... or else. Whatever that or else was, she had long suspected Cora had been free with her hand. Or whatever a powerful sorceress uses. One doesn't get as jumpy as Regina Mills, or as terrified of her own mother, without reason. She kept meaning to ask Mary Margaret about it, but the topic of Regina was still sensitive in the loft. David discouraged such conversations. They always made his wife stay awake at night.

These days Emma sympathized. She rather doubted though, that Mary Margaret and she were having the same thoughts.

"You summoned, Your Mayorness."

Regina rolled her eyes and handed back the memo. "You may not have a tank."

"But the state guard is selling off old ones cheap..."

"Why do you want a tank?"

"To go after bad guys?"

"You think I couldn't stop a tank?"

"Well, hopefully you won't decide to go on another evil bender."

"You can't have a tank."

"Can we at least have the order of bullets."

"Has the Shepherd gone through some kind of gun safety training?"

"We have it scheduled. I'm going to go out of town this weekend to get certified to teach it. Since he can't leave."

"Going back to being David Nolan wouldn't hurt him too much..."

"Regina," but much to her satisfaction the mayor signed the form and handed it to her. "I was wondering if you'd take Henry for the weekend."

"You know I'd take him any time."

"He's excited."

"Don't lie. I know he runs out of my house as fast as he can when you have him stay with me."

"Maybe before. But... not lately." Emma tilted her head to the side. "Do you think you could live with the idea that not everyone is trying to run away from you?"

"It was a bad idea."

"What?"

"You know what I'm talking about."

"It seemed like a good idea at the time. At least to me."

Regina shook her head. "You don't know me. I ... hold things tight and don't let go. You don't want to be involved with me like that."

"I already was, if you remember," she nodded over towards one wall. "In fact I'm not even sure how many orgasms I had over there."

Regina rolled her eyes.

"I'm serious." Emma countered.

"That wasn't me. You didn't know who you were sleeping with."

"A colossal bitch. Regina... you weren't the only one in that for shallow reasons. And I know who you are now."

She smiled a little and shook her head. "It's for the best Emma."

She handed her both forms, denied for the tank, and approved for the bullets.

"Pick up Henry from school on Friday?"

"I'd like that."

The moment of intimacy was over, and they were back to the safe conversation of their son.


	19. Chapter 18

Emma was sitting at the counter at Granny's drinking a beer and watching the few night owls who came to the diner late at night. The Rabbit Hole might be a more traditional watering hole, but it also attracted the kind of people who assumed a woman drinking alone was looking for a man to drink with. Or go to bed with. And the Sheriff of Nottingham, while handsome, was not her type. So she was drinking in Granny's and pondering how much she could drink before she had to walk home.

She'd probably drink less if Ruby was working that night, she tended to slow her down with conversation.

"Do you need me to call someone for you?" Granny asked quietly, with a bit of kindness, "Or you could stay upstairs for the night."

"I'm fine. Not driving and Henry's staying at Regina's."

The older woman nodded, "The Queen on your mind?"

Emma gave her a quizzical look.

"Ruby isn't the only one with wolf sense. No matter what I thought of your taste it wasn't my place to judge." She shrugged. "Regina has her charms when she wants to display them."

"I thought you hated her."

"Oh, I dislike her intensely," she agreed easily, "Your mother came to stay with us not long after she'd had to run from her home. She was a sweet scared young woman. Hard to see why anyone would hate her. I had thought that someone like Regina would have sympathy for that. But I suppose a cold black heart will do that. Predator's go after the weak."

As strange as it sounded, Emma didn't think the last comment was a judgment. Wolves were predators, "Someone like her?"

"Married off at the age she was..."

"I've tried to talk to her about it. The marriage to my grandfather. But she always changes the subject."

"Why do you keep asking her?" Granny said as she wiped the counter.

"It seems... important somehow. Like there is a bit of her still with him. Trapped." Emma shook her head. "Does that sound crazy?"

Granny shook her head. "It was the way it was."

"What was?" Emma said exasperated. "Everyone expects me to understand what no one will actually talk about!"

The other patron, Dopey, ignored her outburst and kept drinking. Granny shook her head, "I suppose we all forget sometimes. What you do and don't know."

"I don't even know what I do and don't know." Emma grumbled.

"I saw her on her wedding day you know." Granny said.

"Regina?"

"It was a royal wedding and most of the kingdom came. She was about yay big from where I was standing holding Red up." She made a small space between her thumb and forefinger. "They said she was beautiful. I'm sure she was. Beauty was never her problem. There were already grumblings. Her father was a prince, but her mother was a miller's daughter. Was she good enough for the king? He was beloved and Queen Eva even more so. I just remember how young she was. And how scared she looked. King Leopold had a taste for young brides. Eva was older than Regina when they married but he was still many years older than she was. Regina was practically a child. Some of us called her the Child Queen."

Emma listened to the story, trying to comprehend it. "No one thought to stop it? If it was that much of a farce?"

"Who stops the King? And besides, her family approved of the match."

"Cora was a nut case."

"She was a monster. As is Regina. Sometimes monsters aren't born. They're made." She nodded to her own arm and the scary looking scars that she so often covered with long sleeves.

"Can you love a monster?" Emma said quietly.

Granny's eyes got big, as if she wasn't expecting it to have gotten that far. But she nodded. "You can, little one. Are you in love?"

"I don't know." Emma said with a sigh.

"That usually means yes."

"She won't even talk about it with me."

"Maybe she's scared? Wolves attack when they're scared."

"She's not a wolf."

"Of course she is. And so are you." Granny smiled at her, "Go home. Do not go to her place. You are too drunk and too love sick to make wise decisions tonight."

"I am not..."

"Don't give me that look young lady."

Emma grumbled, paid for her beer and got up to leave. She did walk home via Mifflin Street, stopping by the gate to look at the house. She could see the light on in Henry's room, and the top of Regina's head. She was leaning over... to kiss him goodnight?

How could you love a monster?

And could a monster like Regina love you back?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma waited a few days, sorting out the conversation with Granny and her own confused feelings in her own head before she acted on them. When she did she decided to avoid Regina's office, and the mansion, instead opting for what she thought was neutral ground. The bench that they watched Henry play after school. It was far enough away that she wasn't even sure he knew they did it.

At least he had never said anything. Though it wasn't like they were subtle and Emma wondered how often Regina had watched her and Henry without her noticing. She didn't even need that mirror trick Mary Margaret had warned her about.

She silently handed Regina her coffee and sat down next to her without asking permission. They watched Henry for a long time in silence before Regina spoke. "No."

"What?"

"I can hear the hamster in your head wheezing at the exercise. Whatever it is that you are about to ask me, no."

"Those are pretty high walls you have put up." Emma said quietly.

"I told you..."

"That you hold on to tight? You know you really didn't need to tell me that."

"You don't seem to be listening."

"Do you want me?" Emma said quietly. "Because I'm starting to feel like a fool. Or like I've been misreading you this entire time. And I'm really good at reading people."

"Your second superpower?" Regina mocked.

"Survival skill. And you didn't answer. You just keep saying no." Emma said calmly, regaining her composure and refusing to let Regina divert this conversation for once.

"I..." Regina sighed. "I don't have the right to take everything I want."

"Aren't we all sitting in Maine because you thought you had that right."

"That was more taking away everything everyone else wanted." She said quietly.

"Isn't that the same thing?"

"Aren't I allowed to learn a lesson from my mistakes?" There was a certain amount of desperation in Regina's voice.

"You are. What you aren't allowed to do is protect me from you. I... think ... that people took so much from you without asking that you've forgotten that sometimes you can want something the other person wants too." Emma stopped talking when she was sure she sounded like a babbling idiot. It would be confirmed in a moment when Regina mocked her.

She didn't. Instead she just watched Henry. "I'd say I don't want to hurt people anymore. That me loving someone always hurts them. But a big part of me does still want to hurt people."

"Are you proud of that part? Do you think you have a right to hurt people?" Emma asked quietly, trying to find some common ground of humanity.

"I've never been proud of that part, Emma. Not even when I was ... well... not even when I was at my worst."

"I've seen your worst."

"No Emma... you haven't. You keep thinking you have, but what you've encountered is a very watered down version of what I can be."

Emma reached over and put a hand on top of Regina's. "You aren't taking anything when I kiss you."

"I don't have a right to it."

"To what?"

"Love. I don't have a right to love you."

Emma was surprised at that and it took her a moment to regain her ability to speak. "Regina... did you just say you were in love with me?"

"No." The former mayor snapped. "I said I didn't have a right to love you. To force it from you, or Henry or anyone else..."

"Regina..." She shook her head slowly. "You aren't forcing anything from me. You are, as far as I can tell, running away from me as fast as you can and I am trying to tell you that I'd like you to stop running."

Regina turned to look into her eyes, searching for something. Emma took her hand in hers. "You aren't the King. You aren't your mother. You aren't forcing me into anything I don't want. Do you think... maybe... we could just try it out and see if there is anything there without the fighting and the hating and the trying to kill each other?"

"How?"

"We could try dinner. Without Henry. And maybe a movie."

"You want to go on a date?" Regina asked incredulously.

"Why not? I understand that's what normal people do."

"Neither of us is normal, Emma." Regina said with a surprised and disbelieving smile.

"Eh, we can still eat things and see a movie. How about it, Your Majesty?"

Regina gave her a dirty look, but seemed to be thinking it over.

"Take a chance Regina." Emma said quietly, and finally the other woman nodded. Emma grinned, "See, it's a start."

"A start to what?"

"Who knows what..." Emma stood up suddenly with more energy than she'd had in forever.

"Don't get too excited, Emma, I always find a way to mess things up." Regina said quietly.

"Not always. You did a damn fine job raising our son."

And both women looked towards the playground.


	20. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Description of the general plot of the movie Pacific Rim, no major spoilers.

Planning the date had actually been a slightly bigger deal than Emma had anticipated. The first time they hadn't exactly planned any of the encounters to a great degree, and they didn't generally spend that much time with each other after it was over. The idea of a first date with a woman you've already been intimate with was new for Emma, it wasn't like she hadn't had sex on the first date before, but not having sex on the first date when you've already had sex usually required the breaking of some portion of the time space continuum.

Which given how her life had been going for the last year seemed very possible.

But none the less, the one thing she and Regina were clear on was that tonight was not going to go beyond dinner and a movie. She had to pick up Henry from her parents that evening. Where and how to do this was also limited. Neither was terribly comfortable being seen out together, at least not in some way that didn't have the cover of dealing with Henry, and Emma was still a little jumpy about the apple turnover to go for Regina cooking.

So they'd settled on takeout Chinese, which went surprisingly well with Regina's hard cider. Emma didn't know the alcohol content, but she suspected 'high' was probably a good descriptor.

"Did you land in this world with knowing how to use chop sticks pre-programmed into the curse? Or well, anything, how did you learn how to drive?" Emma asked as they casually settled on the couch and started the DVD. She'd brought a couple of options, a chick flick romantic comedy, something smart she was sure Regina would choose, and something with a lot of explosions.

Much to her surprise the Queen had chosen giant robots fighting sea monsters. Which meant the evening showed some progress.

"I had the technical knowledge of how to drive, but not exactly the confidence. It's hard to describe and really the first few weeks behind the wheel were pretty terrifying. At least everyone else in town didn't know they were operating strange motorized carriages. But as for chop sticks, no, but 28 years of the same routine lets you learn a lot of things." Regina commented as she picked around her carton for a vegetable.

"I don't know how you didn't go crazy."

"I think it helps that I didn't start from a position of sanity." Regina tilted her head listening to the opening narration. "So these giant aliens are invading through a hole in the Pacific Ocean and humanity is fighting them with giant robots... why not just move your industrial base away from the invasion zone. What are the Atlantic nations doing?"

"Really, you are one of those people, who picks apart the strategy of fictional bad guys?"

"Being a fictional bad guy I have a vested interest," Regina said with a smile.

"Point taken," Emma raised her class and chuckled.

The geopolitical critique wasn't that bad. Emma had seen _Pacific Rim_ before, and Regina's running commentary wasn't so much nitpicking as amused observation. And really, sometime around the Battle of Hong Kong even that stopped as Regina got more invested in the explosions and the sword wielding Jaegers. It was a nice side of Regina to see. Not the queen and not the sorceress. The inner seven year old who totally had opinions on how best to fight two raging kaiju.

"I totally never pictured this as being your kind of movie. I brought it mostly to see if you would mock me."

"I do have a 11 year old son. Besides, I told you, 28 years of boredom. I love Japanese monster movies. Give me a good rampage through Tokyo when I can't sleep any day." Regina laughed and actually leaned into Emma. She was surprised but didn't want to discourage it.

"Yes, but did you imagine yourself as the monster or the army."

"The monster of course. Who wouldn't want to stump around toy tanks. In fact Henry and I used to play Godzilla when he got toy soldiers."

Emma raised an eyebrow.

"Don't look at me like that, my dear, I've been reading comic books with him since before he could read."

"Maybe I should have brought a Marvel movie."

"Maybe you should next time."

The credits had finished, the Chinese had been mostly abandoned, and they were sitting on the couch together and Emma didn't want to leave. Regina's head was against her shoulder and for some reason it felt more intimate than all the times they'd been to bed with each other.

"I liked this," She finally said. "You want there to be a next time?"

After all, this had been an experiment. See if the two of them could manage an evening without killing each other and without Henry to keep them from killing each other.

"I think... we could try this again sometime." Regina said carefully as she sat up, and it reminded Emma of their previous thing. Moments of candor after sex that were quickly turned to cold insults as they both remembered who they were. This wasn't as bad, but it did signal an end to the evening.

Emma squeezed one of Regina's hands, "I liked this, Your Majesty. Thank you."

"It was nice to be around someone like this," Regina didn't explain. "You should probably get back before Snow decides to try and figure out where you've been."

"My mother hasn't LoJacked me." Emma said skeptically.

"Yet."

Emma shook her head. This could only ruin a good night, so she decided to cut it short before it went into the standard Snow White and the Evil Queen diatribe. Her choice for cutting it off was not the eye roll or the grumble.

The kiss that came was soft, Emma sucked on her lower lip for a moment before parting her lips with her tongue. Though it wasn't angry and possessive there was nothing chased about the kiss as they pulled each other closer and Regina began to try and assert herself in the kiss.

When they finally parted Emma could still taste the hard apple cider on the other woman's breath. "If this goes to form you are about to kick me out."

"You were leaving, but I'm not kicking you out."

"First base on the first date?"

"I rather think we're a bit further along than that baseball analogy works," Regina added with a smirk.

"True."

"Next time Disney's _Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs_?"

"Only if you want me to set you on fire."

"How about the Charlize Theron movie?"

"The one with the guy who plays Thor where I'm sleeping with my creepy non-existent brother?" Regina asked with disdain. "You know there are worse ways to die than fire Emma. And I know many of them."

Emma grinned. "You really did marathon them all?"

"I've seen them. And read the Grimm's version. I was never interested in eating Snow's heart or sleeping with your father if that makes you feel better."

Emma paused... "It does, but it also makes me not feel better. I think maybe I should avoid Grimm's fairy tales."

The Queen smiled, "Probably. At least Disney got your mother's fondness for small annoying animals right."

"How did this conversation start?" Emma asked somewhat disturbed.

"You started it. I'm just winning."

"Is everything a power play with you."

"Not everything."

Regina stroked Emma's cheek. "I wish you could stay. I don't want this evening to end."

"Afraid we're fuck up the second date." Emma asked quietly.

"I was sure I'd fuck up the first."

"You didn't."

"I'm glad." Regina said quietly. "Now get on going before your father figures out why the bug is parked at Granny's."

"Would you prefer I'd parked it in front of your house?"

"We could plant a neon sign in the lawn. Your mother might figure it out sooner."

Emma shook her head. Her family figuring it out was a worry for another evening.

"Good night, Regina."

"Good night, Emma."


	21. Chapter 20

"Regina's in a good mood. Perhaps one of us should do a welfare check on Belle." David said thoughtfully as he made eggs. Emma had taken to eating breakfast with her parents as Regina took over her small kitchen each school morning when she came over to eat with Henry and take him to school.

"Or, she could actually just be in a good mood," Snow offered, and David gave her a quizzical look.

Emma looked confused, "Why would we check in on Belle because she's in a good mood."

This time Snow looked slightly embarrassed. "Regina's usually in a good mood if she's hurt someone. And for some reason she likes hurting Belle. One of us should probably check in on her."

"You guys act like Regina's some sort of inhuman monster." Emma shook her head. "She's in a good mood because she's getting to spend more time with Henry."

Snow shrugged. "She can be human and be a monster too. I tend to agree with you, I don't think it's a bad sign."

David shook his head, "Are you forgetting she pulled your heart out of your chest last month, Mary Margaret?"

"I did ask her to."

"That doesn't change anything."

Snow shifted, "Actually it does. I... I've been thinking about it. Do you blame a gun because someone tries to commit suicide with it?"

Emma held up her hand, "Ah, we usually take away the gun from someone who tries to commit suicide with it."

"Still... Regina's done a lot wrong, but I'm not sure you should hold her taking my heart as one of them. She put it back."

"Because she wanted to watch you destroy yourself."

Snow shrugged and shifted a little embarrassed. "I ... think she was trying to save me actually."

David snapped his head around to look at his wife. "She has a funny way of saving you. Didn't she break into this house that day to kill you?"

"Yes... it's just... Regina and I are complicated and I think it's time I stop pretending it's simple," Snow looked up. "We keep asking her to be responsible for her actions but I'm not owning my own. I used her to kill her own mother."

"You did that because you had to," Emma said quietly.

"No... I did it to hurt her." Snow looked down. "Regina and I know each other so well I think we've been hurting each other so long that neither of us knows how to stop."

David got up from his chair and put his arms around her. "I told you, you aren't Regina."

Emma watched the exchange and quietly wondered what Regina would have made of it. "I'm not Regina only because I have my family."

"She doesn't have any family." David observed.

"She had Henry." Emma said.

"And she has me." Snow responded.

"Snow... you pushing it and giving her second chances is what made us all end up here." David shook his head. "I can't let her hurt you more."

Snow gave him a sharp look. "David, I'm not a child."

"With Regina you are."

"Sometimes I wonder if I am with you." She shook her head and walked to the door, grabbing her coat and leaving without comment.

"Was that a fight?" Emma asked quietly. She wasn't used to fights that didn't involve raised voices.

"Yeah. It's the same fight we've been having since the sleeping curse." David sighed. "I'd just hoped we'd finished it after your mother spared her life at execution. Come on, we should probably check on Belle before we go into work."

Emma quietly thought about the kiss she'd shared with Regina the night before, the taste of the apple cider against her lips, and wondered just how badly her parents would take it if they knew.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"My mother wants to make up with you I think." Emma said as she was sitting in Regina's office going over a new anti-vandalism initiative with the mayor.

"And the sun will rise tomorrow. Your mother is your mother." Regina didn't even look up from the work she was doing. "She always thinks she can fix everything with a hug and an I'm sorry."

"That's not usually a bad start." Emma offered.

"Except it's always only a start. And some things you can't fix with an apology." Regina said testily.

"You would know."

"Yes, Emma I would." Her head snapped up.

"Okay, I understand you aren't ever going to be friends with her. But maybe you could try to tone down the dickish behavior towards the general population. Maybe even rule out homicide?"

Regina rolled her eyes, "You knew who you were getting involved with. You take me as I am. I'm not going to start picking flowers and frolicking in the forest talking to animals."

"I hope not. I've already told you how opposed I am to talking to birds in general." Emma said with a goofy smile, trying to defuse things.

"Emma," Regina inhaled and then exhaled. "After my mother, and after the King, I promised myself I wouldn't ever be someone other than who I am."

"So be Henry's mom. She's actually pretty cool."

"Henry's mom is pretty cool." Regina agreed with an uncharacteristically soft smile, and she got up from her chair and walked around the desk, giving Emma a quite lovely view of her legs in that pencil skirt. "Your mother isn't going to be annoying and try to make up with me again."

"I can't say she'll be annoying."

"She is your mother."

"Hey!" Emma complained, but without much behind it. Mostly because her eyes were trailing down the curves of madam mayor's backside. "I was wondering if we could try the second date this weekend? David's working the evening shift on Saturday and I was going to ask Neal to watch Henry."

Regina frowned. "Why your... ex... person."

"Ex-person? I know Neal has been pretty loathsome as a boyfriend but I'm pretty sure he's always been a person." Regina just gave her a look. "I don't want to ask my mother again so soon. I'm worried she'll decide to try and invite my boyfriend over for dinner or some other parenting non-sense as if I'm sixteen and this is a 1970s family sitcom."

"A family dinner with me as your date has a lot of comic potential." Regina observed.

"What it would have is a lot of violent potential, no thanks."

Regina frowned briefly, "While I'm in no hurry, you should probably think about what you are going to tell them. No secret is safe around Snow."

Emma just grunted. She knew Regina was right of course, but she didn't relish the thought of telling either of her parents.

"And Henry finds out first," Regina announced. "Before a second date. I'm not making the same mistakes with him again. New and different mistakes sure, but I'm not lying to him."

Emma wanted to object. She really wanted to figure out what was going on before telling him, but she could see Regina's point.

"Alright. How about dinner tomorrow? I understand you make great lasagna."

"Ah, we're willing to eat my cooking now, Miss. Swan?"

"I'll skip dessert."


	22. Chapter 21

It wasn't lasagna. It was pork chops with apple chutney because Madam Mayor loves trolling Emma and because it was apparently a nutritionally appropriate meal. Henry was excited to have dinner with his moms, especially since they seemed to be getting along. They talked about how his riding lessons were going, and which teachers he liked at school, and Emma was actually surprised how much Regina seemed to be able to get out of Henry that she'd never even thought to ask.

She found herself admiring the easy affection between the two of them, wondering how they slipped so easily into it given how tense and horrible the previous year had been. The answer, Emma realized of course, was that this was how they'd been before she showed up. Before the book. And she felt a bit guilty.

But not entirely. Evil Queen and curse and all.

They cleared the dishes and Regina and Henry loaded the dish washer after Henry had deemed Emma to be doing it incorrectly. Sometimes he did remind her of Regina.

"This was nice." He announced. "It's good to see my moms getting along."

"You mean not killing each other?" Emma remarked.

"You aren't killing each other, right?" Henry asked glancing between them. "You two keep looking at each other but I don't think it's murder."

Regina laughed a little uneasily. "No, but we did want to talk to you about something."

"Something's wrong. That's why we're having ice cream." Henry stated.

"No... we're having ice cream because ... I wanted it." Regina admitted and Emma realized that she was actually scared. No, terrified.

"Your mom and I, we've been talking a lot lately."

"Because of me."

"Yes, it started because of you. But we've started to wonder if maybe we might like each other ... in other ways."

Regina looked like she was about to turn green, and Henry looked between them as she spoke. "What Emma is trying to find a way of saying Henry, is that she and I would like to date. I didn't want to do that without telling you so you didn't think we were lying to you about anything."

Emma had to admire how straightforward that was, and mentally erased the rather convoluted way she had been planning to word it.

"Date." Henry said quietly.

"You know, how when two people..." Emma began, but he scrunched his face...

"Mom I'm 12 not 6. I know what dating means." He looked up at Regina with questioning eyes. "Why are you doing this?"

"I wanted to be honest with you. I'm trying not to lie to you about things anymore." She said quietly.

"No, why are you doing this? Is this some sort of game to beat the savior? I don't understand, the curse is already broken..."

Emma looked over at Regina and she felt like she could hear the other woman's heart breaking a little. "It's not a game Henry. She isn't trying to hurt me."

He looked between the two of them and ran up stairs to his room, closing the door. Emma made a move to go after him but Regina caught her arm. "Give him a few minutes and I'll go up. He runs when he needs some space to think."

Emma raised an eyebrow.

"I did actually learn a few things last year."

Regina finished the dishes, and dried off her hands without saying anything, but brushed off Emma's attempt to give her a comforting touch on the arm. She glanced at her watch and nodded up stairs.

"How do you know he wants to talk?"

"He didn't go running out the door to sit in that death trap you call a car."

Emma nodded and put a hand on Regina's, "I don't think you are trying to hurt me."

Regina rewarded her with a smile that didn't reach her eyes. "The irony here is that the person who is most in danger of having their heart broken is me." Emma raised an eyebrow, but Regina continued. "Your favorite coping mechanism is running away, and I don't get over things easily. As I think can be demonstrated by where we are standing."

"Your kitchen?"

"Maine."

"Point taken." Emma wanted to somehow reassure her, but the truth was she was mostly stuck on the fact that Regina thought she might get her heart broken. Was she afraid of the commitment or how invested was she already. "Should we go up together?"

"You can listen at the door, but I think this is a conversation I should have with my son."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Regina inhaled as she knocked on the door and opened it a crack. Henry was reading a book on his bed, but at least it wasn't the book. "I think maybe we should talk."

"Are you going to say that I hurt your feelings by asking you that?"

"You did hurt me, but it wasn't an invalid concern, so I thought we should talk about it." She sat down on the edge of his bed. "If you don't want us to date, we won't. That's part of the reason I wanted to tell you."

He put down his book and looked at her, "Is it about the curse? Or magic? Are you going to get something out of this? Are you trying to hurt my mom... or is this about grandma and grandpa?"

Regina inhaled. "The curse is broken, and despite everything I think I'm much better for it. I'm not mad at Emma for breaking it. I'm... actually rather grateful."

Henry looked confused, "Grateful?"

Regina offered a little smile. "I had you, but you didn't know who I was. And I worried... all the time really... that you'd hate me if you knew. It turned out you did hate me, but I think... hope," She hated using that word, "That you can also forgive me. I couldn't have that chance if the curse hadn't been broken."

"You aren't trying to hurt her?"

"No... I like Emma very much. I'm not sure how it will work out but I'd like to try and see. But not if you aren't okay with this." She tilted her head. "Henry, I'm really trying to be the best version of myself. That's ... maybe not the person you'd like me to be, and sometimes I'll make mistakes."

She put a hand on his foot and inhaled before continuing on. "Sometimes I do things to hurt other people and sometimes I hurt other people because I make mistakes."

"Why do you have to hurt anyone at all?"

Regina closed her eyes, "Sometimes I get angry, but mostly, because everyone hurts other people. Even without meaning to," She leaned forward a little as if sharing a secret, "Your grandmother and I... we hurt each other on purpose but I don't think those are the times we really wound each other. It's the times we hurt each other by accident that last."

"Grandma's not going to react well to this."

"No." Regina agreed. "But that's not why I want to date Emma."

"Why do you want to date her?"

Regina glanced over at the door where she knew Emma was listening and quietly got up from where she was sitting and closed it. Henry quickly picked up on why, and she walked back over to sit by him and spoke softer. "I think I might be in love with Emma, and I want, maybe, to see if I can be in love with someone and not drive them to run away."

"I'm not running away." He said quietly.

"You did for a long time." She answered without the hurt that might have been there before.

"I'm not now." He reached over and squeezed her hand. "You really think you love her?"

"I've ... known it for quite some time."

"But you were fighting."

"I've been fighting your grandmother for a long time too. I really need to stop fighting the people I love, don't you think?"

He raised an eyebrow himself.

"And if you repeat what I just said about Snow I'll deny it."

He smiled. "Our secret."


	23. Chapter 22

They weren't about to go out. There weren't that many places to eat in town, even fewer that had a passing familiarity with a romantic atmosphere, and none that the mayor and the sheriff could be seen at together without causing a gossip storm the that could be seen from space. So they were at the mansion again and Regina cooked.

"The frilly apron tops off the whole ensemble," Emma had teased leaning against the wall openly admiring the other woman.

Regina gave her a glare but there was humor in it. "Henry got it for me for is ninth birthday. I think Mrs. Lucas helped him pick it out."

There was something endearing, maybe even charming, about the fact that this put together woman would wear anything if her son gave it to her. Neal was watching Henry for the evening and Emma had even managed to avoid an awkward conversation about why she needed a babysitter or who she'd be with. Neal was just so excited to play dad.

Emma wondered if he'd ever be able to stop thinking of himself playing the part. Or if she did. It was hard to imagine it now that she'd gotten to see Regina pull off that dance without suspecting some evil plot.

It was actually kind of sexy.

Dinner was steak with mushrooms and looked to Emma like it came out of some kind of professional kitchen. "How did you learn to cook like this? It's not from back..."

Regina always teased her for the fact that she could never get the words Enchanted Forest out of her mouth.

"The curse gave me some basic knowledge, but I had a lot of time before Henry came along. I watched a lot of Julia Child on the Boston PBS station."

"I'm beginning to think, Madam Mayor, that you watched a lot more TV than you've been letting on."

"You have lived in Maine during the winter, Emma. There isn't that much else to do."

"You picked it."

"A horrible place where no one would have happiness," Regina agreed with something that might have been a self deprecating laugh. Emma loved the hints of humor that she saw behind those eyes, the ones that weren't part of her armor.

In fact, if Emma had been asked, she would have said the evening with Regina Mills might have been the most perfect date she'd ever been on. Quiet, full of humor and moments of getting to know each other without defenses. Human.

Right up until they'd made it up stairs.

The kissing had been glorious. Not like their usual passionate crashing hunger from the first time they'd been with each other a year before. Regina had initiated it, soft, but with a hesitant sexuality as her tongue flitted into Emma's mouth. Their hands had started to explore, and perhaps the hesitant stopping and starting should have been a warning. Each time one of them wondered if they were getting too aggressive they would pull back.

But still they found themselves in Regina's bed. Regina had unbuttoned the shirt Emma was wearing and they had both fumbled with bras. Somehow that always seemed more sexy in her imagination, though she wanted to ask Regina how she managed to do it with one hand.

Regina looked down at Emma for a moment like she had a dozen times before. Like the sheriff was a possession, or a conquest, and then there was something like guilt in her eyes that made the subsequent sucking on Emma's nipple perhaps one of the least sexy experiences of her life. It wasn't hard for her to figure out that Regina was afraid of hurting her. There hadn't been much concern about that when they were having angry sex against the wall of the mayor's office.

Or in a bed at the B&B.

Emma thought if she took control it would be less awkward. Which only made everything a thousand times worse. As her hand went down to part her legs and find the nub of her clit Emma could actually see Regina's eyes go dead. As if she wasn't even there.

"Stay with me..." She'd whispered, out of frustration but that only made her fingers slip and Regina groaned. And not in a sexy way. After enough of this they both just stopped and lay side by side in Regina's bed looking at the ceiling. Anywhere but at each other, though Emma thought she saw the corners of Regina's eyes heavy with tears that were not yet flowing.

"I ... ah... we can figure something out another time."

She found all her clothes as quickly as possible. Everything but one sock and she wasn't about to chase it down given she was sure that Regina was only holding it together because she was still in the room.

The walk of shame home was even more embarrassing for having not actually managed to do anything that would make it better. And a lot that had made it worse.

She thought about going to the Rabbit Hole to get a drink before heading home, but really she was never that much of a social drinker preferring to find her demons at the bottom of a bottle of whiskey at her own home. Except she couldn't do that either with Henry there.

She thought he might actually have been excited when she went off on the date earlier and there was no way in the world she was going to let him know it went that badly. Or what went badly. She slipped her key in the lock and prayed that Neal had managed to fall asleep watching _I Love Lucy_ reruns. Of course her night wasn't that good.

"Hey Em, how'd your mystery evening go?" Ever since the fireball Neal had been trying to offer blatantly obvious false excitement over Emma's dating prospects that didn't involve him. Except he did know her, perhaps better than just about anyone else in town, and he knew that look. "What happened?"

His demeanor shifted from unwilling ex to protective in an instant.

"It's fine."

"Emma that does not look fine. Am I going to have to find some big burly fairy tale asshole to beat up."

"Neal, you don't get to beat up anyone on my behalf anymore." Not that he ever did. "Besides it wasn't a date."

"Come on, you can't seriously think you can hide that. Your Mom was down here after Henry went to bed to grill me on who it was."

"Which is none of your business. Or hers." She desperately tried to change the subject, "Respecting bed times I see? I figured you'd have him up watching something completely inappropriate."

"Her majesty's rules were obeyed to the letter. The last thing I want to do is end up like the servants that upset my dad."

"What did he do?" Emma took down a bottle of whiskey from a hiding place, and tried not to think about the fact that Mary Margaret was playing sleuth with who she was dating.

"He killed them." Neal said simply, rather killing that line of inquiry into getting to know the real Neal. Emma wondered if she could say or do anything right tonight. "Yeah, well, evil does that to people." He glanced down the hall and Emma sighed and handed him a glass of whiskey.

As much as she wanted to drink alone. He nodded thanks and took a big gulp. "Henry doesn't seem to be quite as afraid, which I don't quite get. I mean I was constantly afraid that dad would hurt someone because of me."

"Regina's trying not to hurt people for him."

"Evil always wins, Em."

"She's trying."

"She'll fail."

"I don't think she will," Emma felt this sudden need to defend Regina, after having failed her so miserably earlier in the evening.

Except this was Neal and he knew her. "Oh Emma..." He shook his head. "I know I'm not much of a step up... but really... I was never an Evil Queen." And suddenly she felt like he was reading her like a book. "What did that witch do to you tonight?"

"Don't call her that."

"It's a descriptor Emma. She practices magic, that makes her a witch."

"I think... she prefers sorceress..."

Mercifully he put his glass down. "You've made it abundantly clear I don't get to judge your life."

"You don't." Emma looked him in the eyes, and suddenly she realized that this night could really get worse. "You aren't going over there tonight, Neal. Or any night."

He just shook his head, "Night Em."

The door shut and she found her own bed and wondered if Regina was still crying into her pillow as the tears began to flow down Emma's face.


	24. Chapter 23

Regina was working in the mayor's office early the next day. She hadn't slept at all the night before and sitting around her big empty house reminding herself of the disaster wasn't going to do her any good at all. The first text from Emma had come in at 7:30 in the morning when she'd already been in the office for an hour. Henry's school schedule was waking her up early even on weekends, Regina was privately pleased. Not that she blamed what had happened on her.

It had all been her fault.

The problem with using work to distract her from the disaster of her personal life was that her secretary wasn't there on the weekends so there had been no one to play gate keeper when he'd come storming into her office.

"What the hell did you do to Emma?"

He was brave at least. She wondered if he got that from his mother, because it was certainly not one of Rumple's defining characteristics. "Hello Mr. Cassidy. Would you like to start again with a greeting rather than an accusation?"

Her calm response seemed to take him off guard and she walked over to a pitcher of orange juice and offered him a glass. He looked at her and at it.

"I know poisoning is my style but I really do prefer more theatre when I do it." When he took the glass she poured herself one.

"Emma came back from her date with you crying. What did you do to her?"

"I'm really not going to share the details of my personal life with you, Mr. Cassidy." She moved over to a chair and sat down. She wasn't sure why she was inviting this conversation instead of poofing him away, but she was.

"You aren't denying she was with you."

"It would seem rather pointless to deny. Did Henry tell you?"

"You told Henry?" He was surprised, and she was actually relieved that her son hadn't told this person his mothers' secrets.

"We didn't want him to be upset or feel like we were lying to him. But I would appreciate your own discretion. This is a small town and I don't want Emma to experience any fallout from her..." Regina couldn't even figure out what she wanted to call it. From her misguided attempts to be friends with her perhaps. But friends weren't what they were trying to be the night before.

"You care about her." Neal said surprised.

"Villains get to care about people, Mr. Cassidy. You should know that more than anyone. Your father loves you."

"My father's love for his family always came after his love for his power." He said simply.

She chuckled. Something about that statement surprised her. Not it's truth, but that he's say it to her. "Rumple's capacity for self interest is infinite." She agreed. "If I told you I was different it wouldn't much matter because I'm sure you'd decide I was lying."

He narrowed his eyes and watched her for a moment, "The fact that you would care if I think you are lying or not is interesting. You were one of my father's students."

"He taught me everything I know, but I'm not sure I'd call myself his student. More like his ..." She had too much pride to finish the sentence. "Well... something else."

Neal nodded his head slowly. He didn't need her to say it.

"Is Emma alright?" She asked quietly after a long and awkward silence.

"She was upset when I left last night. What happened?"

Regina shook her head. "What happened is what always happens. Everything I touch turns to ash."

"That... is a more poetic way of saying you always fuck things up. Which is what I usually say. Emma deserves more than that you know." He observed quietly. Somewhere in the conversation his attitude towards Regina seemed to have shifted and she had no idea why. But she wasn't going to object.

"Well, I was raised a lady and I'm a Queen. Poetry is part of the training."

"I'm just a fuck up. And... I know I fucked it up with her. I just don't want you to hurt her more."

"Mr. Cassidy, the last thing I want to do in the world is hurt Emma Swan."

He watched her for the longest time. "I believe you."

"And I still have no intention of telling you my personal business."

Neal nodded. "Thank you for not ripping out my tongue for that."

"I thought about it." She admitted.

"That's not entirely helpful for my changing impression of you."

She raised an eyebrow. "Would you be even more hurt if I told you I don't care what you think of me as long as you do what I tell you with regard to my son?"

He chuckled, "I'm following the rules. Peas and carrots. Two vegetables. Two colors. And whatever happens between you and Emma... as long as you aren't playing games with her you are right. It's none of my business."

She nodded, for the first time deciding that he wasn't the complete fuck up she'd assumed. Even if she still hadn't forgiven him for what he did to Emma. As he was getting up to leave she called after him, "How.. how was Emma last night?"

He paused, as if deciding what to answer.

"She looked guilty. Like she'd done something wrong."

Regina sighed and her shoulders sank a little. Her phone buzzed again.

"I know you don't want my advise... but talk to her. I didn't and that's what destroyed my chance with her."

Regina just watched him without saying anything, the thoughts in her own mind tumbling in conflicting feelings, but she managed to just give him a nod.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The text came in at half past three. A request to meet at their regular spot. The park bench where they normally watched Henry playing after school. He wasn't there of course today. It was a weekend and he was out with his grandmother learning how to fire a bow and arrow. Something Regina probably would object to if she knew, but Emma wasn't exactly about to announce that. An argument about pointy objects and their eleven year old son was not really what she wanted to get into. Especially not when she wanted to understand what happened last night.

She passed a cup of coffee over to Regina as she sat down. Neither of them spoke for a long time before Regina broke the silence.

"It wasn't your fault Emma... it was mine." Emma instantly wanted to reach for her hand, to disagree with her, but Regina wouldn't let her. "I've not had a lot of sexual partners Emma. And most of them weren't ... what you would call intimate."

"My grandfather..."

Regina laughed but without humor, "I'd really appreciate if you didn't refer to him that way. I don't want to think of him having anything to do with you."

"I've never asked... how old were you?" The scenarios playing out in Emma's head right now were all rather nightmarish and she wondered why she'd never put those pieces together before.

"My eighteenth birthday was a fortnight before I first met your mother."

"When you saved her life." Regina nodded. "You disassociated from me last night. Is that how you handled sleeping with him?"

There were tears forming in the corners of Regina's eyes and Emma wished she could hold her. But everything else about the mayor's demeanor said that she shouldn't.

"Does my mother know?" She wasn't sure why she asked that. Mostly because the hellish life that played out in her mind of an eighteen year old girl and a much older man was one Emma had seen play out a dozen times in her life. It was never good. And she knew Regina had had even less ability to escape it.

"Your mother... was a little girl. And I was not about to allow her to see me like that. Like I was after the King ordered me to his chambers."

"You were protecting her?"

"I've never claimed that my feelings about your mother were simple. You've just always assumed they were." Regina took a drink from her coffee. "But as to your broader question, I doubt she's really thought about it much. It wasn't abnormal in our world. A wife is the property of her husband. More so if he's a king. It took me a long time in this world to understand what had happened to me. And that here it would be considered wrong."

She looked out across the pond into the distance and Emma silently condemned herself for missing all the signs.

"We've had sex before Regina. Why last night?"

"Last night I wasn't trying to dominate the Savior." Regina said with a humorless chuckle, but for some reason Emma found that funny.

"Is that what you were doing back then?"

"You surely didn't think it was healthy?" Regina asked in surprise.

"Oh, no. I knew it was a bad idea at the time. But mostly you were my hot bitch of a boss and I make many poor life choices."

That actually made Regina smile. "You do. And this is still one of them you know that?"

"I do..." This time she did reach over and take Regina's hand. "And I have no intention of stopping now. We'll... learn from last night."

Regina looked into her eyes and she looked like she wanted to cry even more. But then she let go of her hand and looked up at a bird flying over head. Her eyes lit with anger and she stood up from the bench.

"You! Down here now!"

Regina was pointing up at the sky and yelling at the bird, which... at least to her credit, came down to land in her out stretched hand. She took a hold of it a little rougher than Emma expected. "Regina... what's going on."

But Regina wasn't talking to Emma now. She brought the bird up so she was looking at it in the eyes. "You don't think I know what you were doing? You think you could do that without me noticing?"

The bird squawked a bit, seeming distressed. But not nearly as distressed as Emma was watching this exchange.

"Oh of course you could have said no." Regina's voice was low and threatening. "You are not too small for me to reach into your tiny chest and rip out your heart with my fingers if you try and stick your beak into my business again."

The bird still seemed distressed but Regina wasn't letting up despite how big Emma's eyes were.

"Regina you just threatened a bird."

"I know what I did, Emma."

"A bird."

"Yes." She continued looking at her pray. "Do you understand?"

"No!"

"Not you, Emma. Him."

The bird actually nodded. Or Emma imagined it nodded.

"Now go off and tell the rest of your feathered friends that I will not be so kind to the next little spy I catch." She let go of the bird and it, rather sensibly Emma thought, flew away very quickly.

Emma was silent for a long time, trying to decide if a relationship with this woman really was advisable all the sudden. "What was that about?"

"Your mother."

Regina said with a sigh.

"My mother?"

"Your mother is trying to find out who you are dating."

"My mother sent an avian army to spy on me?"

"The Charming air force."

Emma held the bridge of her nose.

"I'm reasonably sure she's going to find they're less interested in talking to her for now."

"Because you threatened a bird."

"Because he's going to tell his friends. And I'm a lot scarier than she is nice."

"Well... that's one way to put it."


	25. Chapter 24

It was a lovely spring day and the Charming family were enjoying some time together that didn't involve monsters or evil sorceresses. Henry and David were practicing their sword fighting, with the occasional useful advice from Snow and the occasional not useful suggestion from Emma.

"I really need to teach you how to handle one properly you know." David said with a laugh, "You handle a sword like you are hacking with a machete."

"Were there any machetes in the Enchanted Forest?" Emma asked, taking a sip of her beer from where she was watching them.

"It was a forest." Snow said as she came out of the building with a bowl of hot water. "I do not know how I managed to get this many bird droppings on my car just since last night."

Emma tried to hide a chuckle by taking another sip, "Maybe you annoyed some birds. I had that happen with seagulls once when I lived in Boston."

"Birds always like me..." Snow mumbled.

"Maybe they are afraid of someone else more..." Emma mumbled.

"What was that?" Snow asked over her shoulder.

"Nothing." She said innocently. "Listen, I did want to talk to the two of you about something."

"What?" David asked just as Henry mock stabbed him in the stomach.

Emma and Henry exchanged a look. They'd talked about this a lot and made a decision together. Now she just had to face the hard part. "I'm going to ask Regina if she would be alright with Henry moving back home."

Snow nearly dropped her bowl of water, and Henry looked at her expectantly. Catching herself, she tried not to say anything too bad about Regina in front of him. "Are you sure that's a good idea. I mean he's just settling into his room at your place."

"And he can still stay there sometimes. It's just... Regina's been doing so much better. Better for Henry. And really he was only staying with us because she was in a bad space."

Snow looked like she wanted to argue, but she looked at Henry, and something seemed to soften. "Henry... can I ask you a question?" Snow sat down on the steps of the building and Emma put down her beer bottle wondering what this could be about.

"Sure." He said with a smile.

"I... when I was your age I loved Regina more than anything in the whole world. Maybe even more than I loved my father. But I wasn't very good at loving her. I didn't see how much she was hurting. Changing. Do you think you can? Because I really do believe she loves you. I've seen Regina's capacity for love. But if you are going to move back home with your Mom, I need you to promise me that you'll love her better than I did."

There were tears in Snow's eyes as she spoke, and Henry put a hand on her shoulder. Emma wondered, as much as she might feel for Regina, if there was something her mother and her son shared about this woman that she might never understand. David came over and put his hand on Snow's other shoulder and squeezed it.

"It's not really our place to say anyway, Emma. You and Regina are his moms."

Henry smiled widely, as if satisfied that the battle had been won without any bloodshed. "Don't worry grandma. I'll still be around and staying with Mom sometimes too. I just miss my old room."

"And his mother's cooking." Emma put in.

Snow looked over at Emma with a quizzical look, but didn't say anything about it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Please tell me you didn't order the birds to dive bomb Mary Margaret's car." Emma said as she sat down on the couch in Regina's office while the other woman did paperwork. It was late and they were supposed to go back to the house to try another date. This time without sex, or attempted sex, Emma had the Fellowship of the Ring and she thought perhaps that would be a good follow up to discovering Regina loved giant robots fighting undersea aliens.

"I did not order your mother's feather friends to defecate on her car. They might... not be too pleased with her for putting them on my bad side." Regina said not looking up.

"They're okay with him moving back home." Emma said quietly. "I was wondering if we could make it so that I could have him over my place on weekends? And maybe dinner some night in the week."

It was the reverse of the agreement that Regina had had earlier and something about it made the mayor smile magnanimously. "I think that can be arranged. Was your mother really alright with that?"

"I think she might be warming to you." Emma provided hopefully.

"Your mother's warmth was never the problem, Miss. Swan."

"Neither was yours." Emma shot back, but without any malice.

Regina chuckled. "How are you explaining spending so much time with me. Without Henry."

"I'm not exactly. I mean I told her that you were giving me some magic lessons."

"I'll bet that thrilled her." Regina observed.

"David was less happy with that idea."

"You know it should be more than a lie. You need the lessons."

"I probably do." Emma acknowledge. "Nothing that Mother Superior has been trying seems to work."

"I told you, fairy magic and sorcery are different things."

"Is this going to be one long night of I told you so's?"

Regina gave a mischievous grin, "Perhaps."

Emma shook her head, "You really are still a bit evil you know."

"I'm domesticated."

"Bullshit."

"Well, more domesticated than you are." Regina shook her head, "What are you going to do about your mother's curiosity?"

"About my new boyfriend...?" Emma asked with a sigh. "I don't know."

"She wont react well you know."

"Ya' think?"

Regina might have given a sharp reply to that, but instead put down her pen and moved over to where Emma was sitting to hold her hand. "I'm really... really sorry for whatever this insanity of ..." She waved her hand a bit, "Whatever we're doing... is going to cause you. I need you to understand this isn't some sort of complicated evil plan."

"My superpower may not be a real superpower Regina, but I do know when you are lying. And you're not." Emma leaned in and gave her a kiss on the lips, one that for the first time in their still uncertain relationship Regina returned without hesitation.


	26. Chapter 25

Regina was working on budget reports, papers spread across her desk in an uncharacteristically messy fashion when there was a knock on the door frame. Kathryn, two boxes of salad in hand smiling. "Hello Regina... I thought you might like some lunch."

Regina looked up and tried not to smile but that failed. "How do you know I haven't already eaten."

"Much like my father I have spies in your court. My secretary eats lunch with yours." Kathryn winked and Regina got up from her desk to grab a couple bottles of water from a minifrig.

"You are back to work already from your honeymoon."

"Yes, well, there is only so far you can travel in Storybrooke, but Jim and I are hardly bored."

Regina chuckled and wondered for a moment if this was what like having a friend was. Not that Kathryn wasn't trying, but she feared that there would always be the truth of what Regina had done to her under the surface. That Kathryn would always feel the need to protect herself from her. That Kathryn would have good reason to feel that way.

"Newly wedded bliss." Regina said with a half smile.

"I think I might not be the only one enjoying a bit of a honey moon." Kathryn passed the spinach salad over to Regina along with some plastic utensils.

"I don't know what you are talking about."

"Oh come on, I saw you give that line to my father a dozen times. When you say that, it's opposite land."

Regina gave her a raised eyebrow.

"I live down the street from you. You don't think I see the sheriff trying to hide where she parks her car so she can go over to your place at night?"

"Emma and I are trying to figure out how to co-parent."

"Yes you are. And your dating." Kathryn said matter-of-factly. "You do know that you aren't going to be able to keep that hidden for long. Especially not in this town, when it's her, and it's you."

Regina wanted to continue to deny it, but Kathryn was relentless when she wanted to be and she knew it, "It's only been a couple of dates and we're still trying to figure things out. Figure out if I can avoid making a hash of it."

Kathryn nodded, taking a sip from her bottle of water. "I know what you mean. For all those lessons we got in how to court, no one bothered to teach me at least how to date. But my father never expected me to love whoever I married and my maids never expected me to enjoy making love. Sex for pleasure and marriage for love was for people who didn't have anything on the line."

Regina poked at her salad, "I've wondered if that's why the Charmings are so annoyingly happy. He's got no idea how lucky he is."

"Yes, well, David wasn't always a prince. And I'm not sure lucky is the way I'd describe their romance, given the evil sorceress with the obsessive streak."

Kathryn might have been harsh when she said it but there was a slight uneasy teasing to it.

"Just be glad it wasn't Maleficent they annoyed. She'd go after you for generations."

The two women nodded. "You love her?"

"Snow?" Regina asked surprised but didn't immediately deny it. Which even she actually wondered about.

"No, I mean Emma. Though the fact that you didn't immediately deny that one is a conversation for another time that you shouldn't think you are getting away from Regina."

"I'm not sure this having friends thing is all it's cracked up to be." She grumbled.

Kathryn smiled. "Too bad, you have one if you like it or not. Now, answer the question."

"There was a question in there?" Kathryn rolled her eyes and Regina sighed. "I... think it really doesn't matter what I feel for Emma. Or really what she feels for me. I'll mess this up either way."

"The fact that you are worried about it implies an answer." Kathryn observed. "Are you ready for the backlash?"

"No one's going to try gay bashing a sorceress and a woman with a gun."

"Really not in our culture anyway, at least not the way it is in this world," Kathryn agreed, "But there are people who are going to be mad about the town hero and the town..."

"Villain..." Regina whispered.

"I was going to say bully... but ... Regina do you really think of yourself that way?"

"As a bully or as a villain?"

"Stop paying semantics." Kathryn ordered, and for once Regina obeyed such an order.

"I think... if I want my son to be proud of me I really need to stop pretending I'm not a villain. I'm not sure I can stop being one but I can at least stop ... pretending I can keep doing what I've always done. Especially if I want Emma to feel about me the way I feel about her."

"You do love her." She observed.

She just nodded.

"Well then it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks."

"Of course it does." Regina narrowed her eyes.

"Not in this world. In this world you gave us all a second chance. My father would never have let me marry Frederick gold statue or not. You gave me the world I could do that in and you gave yourself a chance to stop being a villain for the people you love. And for yourself. Take it Regina."

"You sound like Snow White."

"God I hope I don't sound as sanctimonious as Snow sounds most of the time."

And Regina laughed, perhaps a lot longer than she should, and Kathryn just grinned. Succeeding at her task for the day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You are going to be late for your riding session."

Regina called up the stairs as Henry was getting dressed. He'd been back home for four days and it seemed like he'd never left. Well, that was a lie. She wanted it to seem like he'd never left but he'd grown four inches while he was gone and she'd already had to start making a list of the clothes shopping she was going to have to do with him. The amount of sock his pants were revealing was particularly embarrassing.

She should drag Emma along just as punishment for her not taking care of it but she really didn't want her taste rubbing off on their son.

"Mom... would you come riding with me today?"

Regina froze as Henry asked the question coming down the stairs, is riding boots in hand.

"I ... ah... I haven't ridden in a very long time Henry."

"Grandma said you were really good."

Regina sighed, "Well, your grandmother likes to talk about other people's business." Henry gave her slightly scolding look before a Snow White diatribe could start. "But I guess I could go riding with you. I have to stop by my vault to pick up a saddle, boots and tack."

"You have that stuff in your vault."

Regina smiled. "Your grandmother was right, I did like to ride. It's just been a long time."

It didn't take her that long to get the riding gear, and for once Henry obeyed when she told him to stay at the car. The less he was in her vault the better she felt. Though it reminded her that she really needed to cast a muffling spell over the hearts if she was going to come down here with anyone else any time.

"Don't expect too much of me," Regina started...

"You've said it's been a while about sixteen times."

"I'm just a little nervous, Henry." Not really because she hadn't ridden in so long, but because she hadn't ridden since she was the Queen. The Evil Queen. It was a time she was starting to want to forget.

But the horse she was riding was a good one, friendly and strong, and her riding gear already broken in and perfect for her. The stable owner complimented her on the quality and she didn't tell him where it came from. It took only about twenty minutes before she was jumping. Mostly because of Henry's encouragement. He couldn't ride quite that well yet, but he was laughing and cheering her on as she road faster and faster and took more and more jumps.

And she could almost close her eyes and imagine that she was seventeen again. And free.

She turned the horse and patted his neck, thanking him when there was the sound of someone clapping. Emma. She'd forgotten Emma was supposed to pick Henry up.

"My mother wasn't lying, you are good, Your Majesty."

"Snow couldn't lie way out of a paper bag. Of course I'm good."

She dismounted and lead the horse back over to where Emma was. "And the jack boots are a really nice look on you." She grinned and with Henry out of sight she snuck a kiss.

"Riding boots dear."

They thought the kiss was brief... intimate... alone...

They were wrong.

"What the hell are you doing, Regina."

Snow White's voice echoed across the field and everyone in earshot stopped dead.


	27. Chapter 26

"What is wrong with you?!" Snow said as she walked down the hill from the archery range. Why Emma had forgotten she was going to practice today she wasn't sure. Mostly because she tried not to think about Mary Margaret with the bow and arrow like an extra from Xena Warrior Princess.

What really surprised her though, was not her mother's presence, or the yelling, because she was pretty sure she had expected that, was how quiet Regina had become beside her. She was holding the reigns of her horse, and just looked over to the side. "Henry... I think you need to go into the stables and brush down your mount."

"But Mom..."

"Now." Both his mother's said firmly, and facing a united front he obeyed.

"You are going to answer me Regina. What is wrong with you. She's... you're ... my stepmother which makes her..."

"Do not complete that sentence if you want to still have a tongue Snow. We are not related in any way."

Emma was reminded of the conversation she'd had about the King... about her grandfather... and she silently thought that perhaps she should sit down and have a chat with Mary Margaret about why that subject should perhaps never come up again. Among the thousands of subjects between she and Regina that they should never bring up again. Mutual parental homicide seemed high on the list though.

"You've taken everything from me, Regina... why? Is this some sort of enchantment?"

"You can't make someone love you with magic, Mary Margaret. It's against the laws of magic."

Regina turned slightly, "You are actually paying attention in your lessons with the little blue moth?"

"Can we really not insult the blue fairy in the middle of discussing why you are kissing my daughter?"

"Can we really not act like I'm sixteen and you have any right to an explanation for why I'm kissing anyone?" Emma shot back. Regina seemed to be shrinking further and further against the horse. It was nuzzling it's head against her protectively. And just the way Regina was acting made Emma doubly annoyed. Was this the way Regina had been around her own mother? That was the last time she loved someone and ... "Stop. You don't have this right. You can judge Regina for many things but she's behaved nothing but honorably with me about this."

Snow was shocked into silence. "I don't know what we're doing but I do know you don't get stop it. Because I'm not a kid and she's not some cardboard villain. And I don't know if I love her but I would like to see and if you want me to speak to you any time soon you are going to not say anything right now and walk away, Mary Margaret."

Snow opened her mouth, but looked between them, and shut it again. Took a long look at Regina before walking off. Clearly not entirely satisfied.

"Are you alright, Regina?"

She was stroking the horse but shook her head. "No... but it wasn't unexpected."

Emma took her hand. "You haven't done anything wrong."

"And if I feel like I have. For what I've done to you..."

"You haven't done anything wrong here." She leaned her forehead against Regina's. "I'm going to call Neal and see if he can watch Henry for the rest of the day. I'm sure she'll be back. With my father as backup."

"Should I bake some apple pie for this family meeting?" Regina asked with a slightly mischievous and slightly nervous smile.

"I think that would be in poor taste." Emma said with an equally small smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Neal took Henry for the weekend, happy for the time with him and understanding that what was going to go down may be something none of them wanted him to witness. Of course he wanted to stay. Because that wouldn't have been awkward at all. Regina went home to her house, knowing someone would come to her when her part in the farce was to be played, and Emma went to the Sheriff's station, because going to her apartment seemed both too easy and part of her had no desire to make this easy on anyone.

It was David who came eventually, which had a certain amount of logic and at least meant even if her mother wasn't rational the two of them could think somewhat clearly, "Hey."

"Hey."

He stood there quietly for a long time saying nothing.

"This is going to be a really weird conversation if you don't start talking." Emma grumbled.

"It's going to be weird either way," David shrugged. "Your mother is crying."

"Of course she is. Because it was all about her."

"Well, in my experience, when it comes to Regina, it generally is all about Snow."

"This time it's not."

"Are you sure?"

"David, I've been dealing with Regina for a while now. And... we've been getting close for a long time. It kind of happened naturally and really if anyone tried to make it not happen it was her."

"You can't trust her, not with something as valuable as your heart Emma." David said with a great deal of sympathy.

"Why... she's trusted me with hers." Emma tilted her head. "I told Mary Margaret. We don't know what's going to happen. Whatever this is... it's just starting. But we've been putting it off for a long time and I think it's time we stopped. And I... I really need you and Mary Margaret to trust me even if you don't trust her, to see if this is real. Because it feels real now."

David watched her for a long moment. "You'll protect yourself?"

"I'm pretty sure that's not how relationships work, Dad."

He nodded after a moment. "Your mother is still not going to like it."

"She doesn't have to. I'd just... appreciate if she'd respect it for now." She tilted her head to the side. "And... not kill Regina."

"Well, she's heading over to her house now I'm sure. Since I told her to stay at the loft. So I think we'll know in a little bit if it results in murder."

"Should we go over there?" Emma asked concerned.

"Do you think Regina will hurt her?"

The question seemed so strange to Emma. "I think it's more likely that Regina will curl up in a ball and take whatever Mary Margaret throws at her." That was the problem with self hatred. You didn't need to hurt yourself. You could just let your enemies do it for you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She knew who it was when she heard the knock on the door. She mentally prepared herself for more screaming, and at least this time not allowing herself to slip back into a memory of long ago. Of another lover on a hill above a stable. Of being caught. It had been the smell of the horse that had done it she was sure.

Snow wasn't her mother, but for a moment in her own mind she was back with Cora, back watching everything be taken from her.

She opened the door and folded her arms.

"Regina, can we talk?"

"Can we?" She asked with a sneer.

"Please." Snow said quietly. "We've been at this so long and now ... why Emma?"

Regina shook her head and walked out of the doorway, expecting Snow to follow. Which she did. Because walking into someone elses home uninvited was something Snow would do.

"Believe it or not everything isn't about you."

"You've been hiding. You even tortured squirrels so they wouldn't share your secrets."

"I threatened birds thank you, I never had any conversations with squirrels. Perhaps your woodland friends understand the value of secrets better than you do."

Snow rolled her eyes. Because she would. She never understood that hurt.

"Why have you been hiding? If you were going to take her from us like this..."

"I'm not ..." She closed her eyes. "Believe it or not, as I've already said it's not about you. It's about Emma and maybe the only person whose actually listened to me and seen me since I was..."

And then something seemed to snap in Snow. Her eyes got big, "Since you were a young woman on a horse."

"Since about then, yes."

Snow almost reached out to her, but seemed to think better of it. It was good. In the mood Regina was in she wasn't sure if she'd cry or light the younger woman on fire. "Do you love her?"

Regina laughed. It was totally inappropriate to the question and to the situation and had no humor in it at all. But it still managed to be funny. "The last time a Charming asked me if I loved someone it was Emma. About Henry. And she decided I was lying."

"Tell me and I'll believe you."

"Well, the answer isn't as simple as that, Princess. I..." Regina's voice caught, "... I'm not really sure if I can. My heart is so dark... and it's been so long. But... yes. I think I love your daughter."

She tilted her head to the side as if waiting for the retort or the next accusation.

"If you don't know for sure... I think that's probably a good indication that you do." She leaned against the nearest wall. "What a mess."

"Why do you think I've been resisting."

"How long?"

"How long what?" Regina asked confused.

"How long has this been going on?"

"Forever, and ... not long at all."

"That's not an answer." Snow replied.

"It's what I have. I've been in love for a long time... but we've only come to this place recently."

"Why can't you do anything simple Regina?"

Regina laughed and answered honestly for once, "Because I mess up everything I touch. And I really don't want to mess this up."


	28. Epilogue

Regina and Emma walked down the street towards Granny's with Henry between them. It wasn't the most romantic spot for their first date "date", but neither one of them really expected anything about this meal to be romantic. They were doing it to be seen.

They'd explained it to Henry, that with his grandparents knowing there wasn't much point anymore in hiding what they were doing. After all they weren't doing anything wrong. What they didn't tell him was that they both expected a certain amount of backlash to the town finding out that the Savior and the Evil Queen were seeing each other romantically. Of course Henry had wanted to go to dinner with them, because he didn't anticipate what Regina in particular feared, that some of the towns people would feel they had the right to comment.

So they'd arranged for Neal to take Henry for the evening.

And then he'd wanted to come. _"I do not need a big brother."_ Emma had told him, but he'd winked a bit at Regina and suggested that maybe she did instead. They'd even laughed in the strange and uneasy peace the former Evil Queen and the son of Rumplestiltskin had found in their shared backgrounds.

Regina squeezed Henry's hand and gave him a kiss on the forehead, and Neal asked again if maybe they needed him to come in and sit across the dinner as backup. They declined again and the two mother's watched as their son went off with his father. "Remember the rules, Mr. Cassidy!" Regina called after him.

"Two vegetables! Different colors. Beige doesn't count."

And even Regina smiled at the little joke before turning to look at the door of the dinner as if facing a battlefield.

"Hey..." Emma said, drawing her attention back to her. "This isn't like marching to your execution. It's eating a burger."

"One of those things at this place is certainly a death sentence." She inhaled again. "Besides, I've faced an execution before. It had a lot of the same cast of characters."

Emma reached down to squeeze her hand. "It's just dinner. And no one is going to say anything to our faces."

"Or I'll light them on fire."

"If we could perhaps get through the evening without any emulations that would be a good thing." Emma said seriously, but then cracked a smile and leaned in to kiss her. It was long, passionate, their lips lingering and Regina sucking a little on her lower lip before the kiss finally broke.

"We could stay out here and do that." Regina said quietly.

"We are on a public street, Your Majesty. If we stayed out here and made out people would notice." Emma smiled mischievously. "And then I wouldn't get the satisfaction of watching you eat a hamburger."

"If you keep teasing me about that, I'll go back on that little agreement."

"No you won't." Emma squeezed her hand and they walked up the steps together. Emma opened the door for her and although no one paid them that much mind initially the dinner became quieter with each little romantic gesture. When Emma took her coat for her, and held out her chair. When they ordered wine. When their hands slid across the table to touch each other.

But by that point it wasn't a performance. They had forgotten the audience.

Because they had both been putting off this moment for so long that when it finally came the only people in the world they could see was each other.

And they could, finally, see each other.

Fin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you all for reading. This has been really satisfying to write. A word on the ending, and the title, this fic has always been about the possibility of a relationship, a beginning, and so it seemed right to end where they were really starting. More fics set within this same universe are not only possible, but likely, including a season 1 prequel fic. But this one has a natural end here. I have many to many people to thank, but especially SgtMac7 for all the help she's given me over the last few months bouncing ideas and dialogue off of her. This fic would not be the same without her advise and encouragement.


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